BPDFamily.com

So i meet this girl about 2 years ago. I had been singel for almost 4 years prior to this for personal reasons (career, selfreflect and so on..)  She was the most beautiful girl i ever seen. The whole package.

It all started with us talking on the phone for hours at a time. We both live in a small communtiy so we where near. Well a week later she came to myplace for drinks. From there it started of really intensely and all what i hava read here began. I was the knight in shining armor, she mirrored me, lovebooming an all the typical things. We where about 3 months in were we had been together everyday and this was the first time she pulled away. It went  like a few weeks and she wanted to get back together. I took her back and then she started with the push/pull effect. everything was fine for a week then out the blue she blocked me and said it won´t work. charmd back after a few days and it went on likes this for awhile. Total nightmare!

I then cought her, she was cheating, having another guy on the side, as i cought her cheating with this guy she blocked me. Moved in with him. Moved all her stuff to his place, this was a refugee, and they couldn´t even communicate. He did not speak english, nether does she.

So after aweek i broke nc, i was so confused and asked her what was going on with her. Som after along talk, she moved out and came back to me. Things moved on smoothly in some sence for many months untill she got really jelous and controlling, we started to fight alot and i was constantly defending myslef for things i didn´t knew anything about.

We didn´t brake up but it was a bumpy ride most of the time. I really loved her so i tried my best but it was so hard. Nothing was ever enough.

Then about a year in to the relationship the same pattern started again, push/pull,  everything was fine for a week sometimes maybe longer then out the blue she blocked me and said it won´t work. charmd back after a few days and it went on likes this for awhile. Total nightmare!

Then i found out that she had been with this other guy in the times she had me blocked. Finally she left me to be with him. I was devistated. Of all the times she told me she loved me and all the other bullPLEASE READ (https://bpdfamily.com/safe-site.htm) she just replaced me like that with this beta loser.

Well after a few weeks she contacted me again and wanted to come back. As i love her so much and is so fudged in the head i took her back.

Things went back to normal, a short lovebombing phase and he was out of the picture. 3 months later she just left. She wrote me a text massage that it´s over, a few days later she came to move all her stuff out. I tried to go nc and was done.

Not long after i heard she was back with this same beta loser guy. And somehow iknew it. I had her blocked everywhere but heard from friends that she has changed her fb status and was uploading alot of pictures with them together.

I got to about 2 months of nc before i broke the silence and contacted her. She wanted to talk. We talket for hours. She said se still loves me and that she thinks about me everyday. But told me PLEASE READ (https://bpdfamily.com/safe-site.htm) like she was having great sex with this guy and coming everytime, xactly like she had with me, if nothing the relationship was sexual and some of the best sex of my life. Even she told me many times that it was the best sex she ever had.

So as we sat there talking she started to hug and kiss me, she wanted to come back and promise she would leave this guy the same day and come back to me. Well as we both went to work, she did not write me so much untill the evening telling me she made a misstake and she is going to be with the other guy and blocked me before i could  answer. This was now 9 days ago and im feeling like PLEASE READ (https://bpdfamily.com/safe-site.htm). Like im really losing it. Will she come back to me again? Will she contact me? How can i get this addictive trauma bond PLEASE READ (https://bpdfamily.com/safe-site.htm) out of my life. Im so lost and so broke and i miss her so much, and the though of thinking she is having great sex with this new guy is killing me.

Sry for the bad english, im finnish so it is not fluent. Please help me im going crazY!

This cycle happens to me, like we've been together for three years , but off and on, all the time , every time we break up she always has some other guy waiting with open arms , and legs to take her in.

At the end of the day , I'm beginning to think me and you both need to wake up, were both wasting our time on something completely unstable.

You need to ask yourself , do you want to be in this position another 2-3 years down the line ?

I don't doubt they'll come back, yours most likely will, mine might, were still living together in a flatmate kind of way, she still relies on me for support at the moment, but I dunno, it sucks really .

Like this girl text me , saying I love you and you're my best friend , but I love another and might get with him, but don't want to as I'm sure about him, and still like you. It's such a mind screw.

You are so right! But it´s so hard, she has such a powerful control over me/us? It´s like my whole life is in ruins. And i read about this trauma bond thing. Feels like she is a really toxic drug and i just can´t quit here?

Got any good advice friend?

Still i feel with you. This sucks so much. Really is hell, im sry you are in this pain as well.

I sent you a PM.