BPDFamily.com

So this was how it worked out tonight.  My wife made a phone call to her aunt and she did not answer.  Things moved forward as she continued to sew and I worked on some computer work.  Then out of nowhere, she is on the subject of how my parents don't care and don't believe the issues our kids are going through.  (the kids have a Genetic disorder).  
She says that we are they don't believe the kids are sick and she cannot believe that we never thought of it.  They should go get a blood test so that we can prove the problem.  How could they deny it if they are the ones that caused have it in them?  I then am being put in the position of needing to agree or I am siding with them and I would rather be with not her. This is going to be hard to navigate and I can see there is going to be a long hard road.  She was earlier in the car she asked again I cannot believe we have not thought of this before what do you think she asked me.  I said I think we have talked about this before (which we have).  Now she says so you are discounting what I am saying.  Because we talked about it before it does not matter now.  I did not know how to handle this and that is where I just shut down.
Now she is on her family and all the issues they have going on about how they hate her and how they and others around us see her all negative right now.  I don't know how much longer I can deal with this the same way.  I know that shutting down is not right but it is a defense mechanism for me.  That is it we will see how long this lasts.