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Does anybody on this thread check on their BPD ex on social media? Just in case they contact you again in the future? If your ex had kids with the new person, how long did the relationship or marriage last? Or even if they never had kids, how long did the honey moon phase last?  And did they end up divorced within a year or two?
I found out that I didn’t block his latest girlfriend on Facebook which I forgot to do. I ended up blocking her for the sake of my sanity so that my curiosity doesn’t get the best of me. This way I can fully move on without having to think about him or anyone connected to him. 
My BPD ex stalked me on social media for 18 months, sent me half naked pictures over instagram of him with his now “wife” making out in a swimming pool, and then discarded me last October. This was after a friend of mine told him to stop messaging me online because he’s harassing me. I just found out through Facebook that he got this second girl pregnant when he’s only 27. He already has a six year old daughter with somebody else who I met in person twice when I dated him. He married this other girl because he got
Her pregnant (probably on purpose)and she’s from Mexico.

I wasn’t purposely stalking his new wife; I don’t know why it bothers me so much that he got her pregnant. I should be glad that it isn’t me. I guess I’m curious to see how long this “marriage will last”. He’s only been married to her for 3 months now.  He is still active on dating sites like Badoo. The guy got the girl pregnant within less than a year of them dating. The longest relationship he has ever had was 10 months long. His relationships never last longer than that with the exception of his first baby mama who he trapped by purposely impregnating her. He stayed with the baby mama for 3.5 years. Now he’s going to owe two baby mamas child support. How  you can afford that at age 27 working as a truck driver is beyond me?

He was pretty close to getting me pregnant as well. The guy refused to wear protection when he was with me, and I didn’t see how manipulative he was being until His friend warned me about his dark side. A part of me misses his good side, but now I am relieved because that could have been me that he impregnated.

If you are trying to detach or want to detach then social media needs to be done away with. Just saying. I won't judge others about social media, but personally I never have and never will have anything to do with social media because I believe it is a cancer. Anyway, beyond that...I would say count your lucky stars and blessings for avoiding a potential disaster.

Its ok to miss people and keep the positive memories of them, but let those memories be still pictures in your mind and leave it at that. You matter so only focus on you and move forward.

You honestly shouldn't be wasting any thoughts on him whatsoever. It is mental space, time, and effort wasted on someone who is undeserving of your attention. Please strive to place your focus on bettering YOU and your life. Take the lessons and pain from failed relationships and incorporate them into your evolution as a person. Allow yourself to grow and become the person you want to be. By doing this you will naturally attract better opportunities and better people. Want better, expect better, do better.

Cheers and best wishes to you!

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i looked at my exs social media for a while after we broke up. i needed to stop for a while, because even the most innocent things would send me into a total tailspin.

it sounds like there is some unresolved pain here. are you watching to see what happens in his new relationships? are you hoping he will contact you at some point?

I have him and his new wife blocked on any social media platform that they have an account on. He contacted me last October 2018, but I blocked him because I didn’t want him sending me any more pictures of him with the latest gf.

Maybe there is some unresolved pain. I still have these weird dreams about him on and off. I have not looked at his social media since last October 2019.  A couple of my dreams about him turned out to be premonitions and predicted the future. I keep dreaming that I will meet him in person in the future. To be honest, I’m glad that he hasn’t contacted me again because he stalked me for 18 months. but yes I guess I am still semi curious about his new relationship. Curiosity kills the cat so I’m stopping myself from now on from looking at his social media or his wife’s social media.  I doubt it will last either way.

Of course there is some unresolved pain. Its ok though...it is totally normal when having been engaged in a relationship with a cluster b personality type and subjected to their bizarre, extreme, and damaging behaviors. Definitely don't be so hard on yourself though. You deserve better than that.

This is going to take dedication, effort, and good old fashioned work, but I have faith in you that you will heal and find true happiness and success. Why do I think that or say that? Simple...you care enough about someone who wronged you. You are still in a sense showing kindness in the face of darkness and despair. That is strength, not weakness. This means you have the potential to grow and can learn from your mistakes. Take your relationship for example...apply the concept of excelsior. In time this relationship will have served as a catalyst to help improve your life with better relationships and opportunities...if you open your mind and heart to them ;-)

Cheers, best wishes, hug to ya!

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