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Title: Quiet Borderline Post by: LFCNZ on April 25, 2020, 11:22:31 PM Hi there
Just wondering if any others have a quiet borderline in their life? The one issue I always had with my mothers diagnose as BPD was the fact that they were supposed to have these bouts of external rage, I never saw this with my mother(well I have seen it twice now and both times directed at my wife) but apart from that I have never really seen the rage side, I'm thinking the fact that she is a quiet borderline definitely seems to fit her better. Just curious if anyone can relate. Thanks Title: Re: Quiet Borderline Post by: GaGrl on April 25, 2020, 11:49:23 PM Do you experience silent treatments or a sense of being frozen out?
Title: Re: Quiet Borderline Post by: LFCNZ on April 26, 2020, 02:14:29 AM Do you experience silent treatments or a sense of being frozen out? Yep thats exactly the way I remember her treating me as a kid and even now, so if I did something to make her angry, she wouldn't talk to me for days, silent treatment, hold a grudge, well that's the way it felt, so I guess as I believed all BPDs exploded, it sort of didn't make sense with that diagnosis, but a quiet BPD from what I have read so far, sounds exactly the way she is. Title: Re: Quiet Borderline Post by: Harri on April 26, 2020, 05:12:28 PM Hi.
My mom was not what I would call a quiet borderline though she had moments of being quiet and acting in BPDish ways. We do have some members who have/had quiet loved ones with BPD. I think I read about most of them on the son/daughter board and on the bettering a relationship board. Unfortunately we do not, as a group talk much about the quiet/inward acting BPD. I tend to think of the quiet ones as the waifs and hermits as described by Christine Lawson in her book Understanding the Borderline Mother (here is a link to the book review which also has a link to the free audio book: https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=53779.0;all) My mom did the silent treatment too and also would retreat to her own spot (basement, etc) to sleep, stew, etc. Her forms of punishment for me, tended to be more directed towards herself in terms of actions but she heaped shame on my brother and I with those very actions and words. It is hard to describe (plus I think my mom what schizophrenic or even schizo affective so it is hard to tell). Silent treatment is the worst IMO. I preferred my mothers rages for the most part. |