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Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD => Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD => Topic started by: milomisty on June 07, 2020, 07:12:21 AM



Title: feeling trapped
Post by: milomisty on June 07, 2020, 07:12:21 AM
Hello,This is my first post.
I have just read "Stop Walking On Eggshells" which was great. My daughter(20) has BP and her mood swings dominate the household to the point where her 2 siblings want to move out. This is very sad for me as when things are smooth all is good. At times I feel socially trapped by her as I don't go out if I know she will be home on her own. My social life is non existent as she has no friends so expects me to always be there for her.
Sometimes I feel like she knows how to manipulate us. I am tired of the emotional rollercoaster.
Does this sound familiar to anyone? I would like to hear from you if you have a similar situation.
Even tonight I was going to bed to read and she got annoyed because she would have to go to bed as she didn't want to sit alone in the loungeroom.So the I feel guilty and trapped that I can't do something I enjoy.
Sounds like a whinge but I am feeling frustrated and stressed at making the situation a calm happy place for us all at home not just her.


Title: Re: feeling trapped
Post by: Dimpy on June 07, 2020, 11:02:51 AM
I feel for you as we are in the same boat.  Completely isolated and with no support. 
Never know when a simple thing can rock the boat and lead to a storm.
It is exhausting and frustrating to say the least.  Even when one implements the right language,
the right validation, it may never be enough.  It is a tough ride.


Title: Re: feeling trapped
Post by: Modesty68 on June 08, 2020, 11:09:17 AM
Hi there! Oh yeah, I can totaly relate! In addition to the BPD my d has a eating disorder, that makes us eat just the food she is able to eat, and exact at 7 every night. Oh boy, where did my life go  :)
Fortunately, after about 9, she goes to her room and stay there.
Well, I think I just feel bad when I am having a good time, as long as I know she is having a bad time. I know the books are saying that we have to set boundaries and also do things for ourselves. But that is so hard!
I have signed up for the zoom-version of Family Connections course. I look so forward to it! There are also a lot of books to read. I have read Valerie Porr's book: Overcoming Borderlina Personality Disoder, and I really recommend it.
Stay safe!