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Title: Dealing with family courts, the lies/false accusations Post by: Catan on July 21, 2020, 01:38:56 PM Hi everyone,
I left my ex (undiagnosed BPD) about ten months ago. We have a two year old together, who has been seeing for two days a week. We are half way through family court process, and it has been harrowing to say the least. My ex was abusive on many ways. Extremely critical of me as a new Mum, and went from 0 to 10 into rages often. He was occasionally abusive as well. I was scared of him, as he often made threats that Social services would come and take our son away etc, or he would threaten to commit suicide. His family turned against me. I'm not sure how i mustered up strength to leave in the end :( The good news is, i left. However leaving was only the start of the battle. The last 6 months of family court have been really struggling. I am not against contact between my son and my ex, i just want it to be age appropriate and safe - to do this it means that my ex abusive history needs to be taken into account. He has admitted nothing. Infact, he is now portraying me as the unstable, unpredictable one and that i was abusing him constantly. There are so many flaws/exagerations in what he is telling the courts it is a joke. There is very little evidence. However, my ex is a solicitor and a master of manipulation. I am seriously scared that he is building a case against me and the judge will take his side. There is already a history here of my ex calling the ambulance, falsely accusing me of being psychotic (it was proven that i wasn't), making false accusations to police which ended up me being arrested. I get the feeling he is out to destroy :( I have always thought he suffered from BPD. He refused to admit that he has any problems, just keepings on blaming things on me - during and even after the relationship. For those survivors of an abusive BPD relationship, and a custody battle - I would appreciate any guidance. What helped you get through the process? How did you not get overwhelmed by the process? C x Title: Re: Dealing with family courts, the lies/false accusations Post by: Bpdpo on December 12, 2020, 12:29:44 PM Hi, how have things been going with your custody and divorce? Your case sounds very similar to mine except my partner is a police officer. We have just started the custody and the lies have started.
Title: Re: Dealing with family courts, the lies/false accusations Post by: CoherentMoose on December 14, 2020, 02:51:32 PM Hello. Document, document, document everything. If you have not done so, read "Splitting" by Bill Eddy and Randi Kreger. It will provide some good background information on what is going on as you proceed. Read and post in here. Some of them have walked a very similar path you may be on. This is an amazing resource. Good luck. CoMo
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