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Title: How to proceed? BPD Girlfriend or Ex- Post by: Ger93 on August 17, 2020, 05:15:33 PM Hello everyone, my name is Ger93. I am from Argentina
I have been in a relationship with a girl with borderline since January of this year. I live in Argentina and she lives in Paraguay. We used to see each other often until the pandemic and quarantine started. the distance is always difficult but it was not an impediment if we could see each other. today is 5 months without seeing each other. In that period of time I was experiencing their behaviors that I had never seen come to light before. She in particular tends to get very stressed at work and in May she had a crisis in which she relapsed into her addiction to pills. she recovered right away luckily. But after that episode she said that she had no strength and she no longer knew if she loved me, I continued to be constant. In that period I began to learn about the Borderline and I noticed that her behaviors could be attributed to the condition of that disorder. She stayed away for a few days but we kept communicating and then she felt love for me again,or that made me feel and that's what she said. Two weeks ago another crisis at her work and perhaps a misinterpretation that I would abandon her made her take pills again, days later she was constantly irritated. She broke up with me saying that she was convinced that she wanted me this last time and that she did not want the relationship at this time. So I gave her some space, forced by her because now she is not very communicative. I decided to get a permit to travel despite the pandemic and I will go see her in a few days. But I do not know what situation I will find. I still love her I need support, and advice. Thanks Title: Re: How to proceed? BPD Girlfriend or Ex- Post by: pursuingJoy on August 19, 2020, 07:42:35 PM Hi Ger93! I grew up in Bolivia. Small world. :)
So many people here can understand what you're going through. From the behavior you're describing, I can see why you think it may be borderline. It sounds like you're able to stay calm when she is dysregulating, which will really help you. Have you prepared for the different scenarios you may encounter when you go to visit her? What are some of the possible ways this could play out? Does she have support? It sounds like you've done some reading already. Understanding BPD has been incredibly helpful for me. pj |