|
Title: Introduction Post by: Witchy Woman on February 13, 2021, 02:36:52 PM Hi, just thought I'd introduce myself. I'm living with my guy and his ex of 19 years was recently diagnosed with BPD, and is probably undiagnosed with other disorders. We have 5 kids between the two of us - my kids are 18 and 15 and his kids are 18, 17, and 11. We've been together 2 years and it hasn't been easy. I'm grateful for the diagnosis - my guy's oldest told us about it - because I feel like it'll give us a point of reference. I've been doing some research for my own understanding - a lot of things make more sense now - and I was really glad to come across this forum. I have already picked up on some really good tips for my own health and wellbeing... Any advice is welcome. :)
Title: Re: Introduction Post by: alleyesonme on February 14, 2021, 12:44:29 PM Hi, just thought I'd introduce myself. I'm living with my guy and his ex of 19 years was recently diagnosed with BPD, and is probably undiagnosed with other disorders. We have 5 kids between the two of us - my kids are 18 and 15 and his kids are 18, 17, and 11. We've been together 2 years and it hasn't been easy. I'm grateful for the diagnosis - my guy's oldest told us about it - because I feel like it'll give us a point of reference. I've been doing some research for my own understanding - a lot of things make more sense now - and I was really glad to come across this forum. I have already picked up on some really good tips for my own health and wellbeing... Any advice is welcome. :) Welcome! I just found this site about a year ago, and the people here are awesome. So knowledgeable and helpful, and there's a sense of unity in knowing that so many other people on here have gone through something similar to whatever you're going through at that moment. You've come to the right place. I was introduced to the book "Stop Walking on Eggshells" a little over a year ago, and that book was extremely helpful. It helps you understand what BPD is and isn't, that you aren't alone, how people develop BPD, and tools you can use in your interactions with someone who has BPD. IMO, reading that book is the best place to start so you can understand what your partner and his kids have been - and still are - going through. Title: Re: Introduction Post by: TryingPatience on February 16, 2021, 09:50:28 PM Welcome! MY SO's ex is uBPD. He has a S10. We've also been together 2 years and it can be a STRUGGLE. Children make it more difficult. Good luck and welcome to the group!
Title: Re: Introduction Post by: kells76 on February 20, 2021, 11:29:53 PM Hi, welcome;
I'm a stepmom to 2 (15 and almost 13) and their mom (my husband's ex) has many BPD-type traits. My best advice is to get as much support for yourself as possible, both professional and peer, because we all have issues from our pasts (whether family of origin or other) that impact our parenting/step parenting and our interactions with the disordered ex. The most low key times we had with the kids were when they were 10 and 12 and had just had a lot of counseling. Good years. Things are ramping up again with a teen and almost teen, and I am struggling with trauma responses. So, I need a lot of support, and I know that will help me help them the most. Take care of yourself first, it's not selfish. Keep posting and sharing whenever works; kells76 Title: Re: Introduction Post by: Witchy Woman on March 03, 2021, 07:12:11 AM Thanks all for the welcome, suggestions, and support.
|