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Title: discard? Post by: Lostinkitimat on February 17, 2021, 08:02:51 PM i have been separated and co parenting with my x since 2015.
she got the jump on me early. was awarded very generous support payments. i worked and payed. saw it all the men, drinking, lack of care for my children. i made it to the end of spousal support (yayyy!). last may i made a report to the mcfd about some abuse allegations. it took a few months for the ministry to get back to me. once they did thing escalated quickly there was another report made by the rcmp due to a domestic incident with my x and her bf. then once involved there was a suicide attempt, a move to a trailer, new bf, new place then a allegation of abuse with his child. long story short the rcmp and ministry removed the children from my x. im off work and have had the children in my care for the last month. since i have served the x. its a thorough affidavit. ive known this day could come for a long time and have many notes and screenshots etc. also i have worked tirelessly to prepare for the inevetable. so se gets served. and...nothing? no abusive texts, threats nothing? i mean honestly i know shes done. but i have strived prepared, waited. and tis is it? it cant be. court is mid march. and i guess at this point its a done deal. thees been no reply to the affidavit or anything. if it wasnt for the kids calling her once a week id think she was dead. dont get me wrong im happy that the universe has answered my prayers. but im waiting for the shoe to drop. Title: Re: discard? Post by: CoherentMoose on February 18, 2021, 03:03:09 PM Prepare for the worst, hope for the best. Check and re-check your plan. Review everything with your lawyer. Execute smartly. Go for everything you are entitled to and maybe even more. Make no "easy" mistakes. Post your concerns in here and let us know how things go. Good luck. CoMo
Title: Re: discard? Post by: ForeverDad on February 19, 2021, 05:34:40 PM One mistake we Nice Guys and Nice Gals are prone to make are to try to look overly fair and overly whatever. News flash, court doesn't expect us to be overly nice, fair or whatever. Yes, it doesn't want us to be vindictive or "mean" but other than that, just do whatever it takes to be a good parent. If that means you can become the Primary Parent, do it. If that means your Ex has limited contact with the kids, so be it. You know that being nice to your Ex won't be rewarded or appreciated so stick to having yourself and your children as your priorities. Don't "gift" her any room to make problems in your life and parenting.
A perspective I read long ago and have often repeated... The one behaving poorly seldom gets consequences and the one behaving well seldom gets credit. Believe me, your ex's interests likely will be well defended by family court. Maybe she'll get appropriate consequences, maybe not. Don't worry about her. If she lets it all go uncontested, count your blessings. Your sole concern ought to be (1) yourself so you can care well for the children and (2) the children. |