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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: RandallUk30 on April 24, 2021, 04:13:05 PM



Title: Looking to date again but unsure if I'm being paranoid
Post by: RandallUk30 on April 24, 2021, 04:13:05 PM
I've enjoyed some nice single life over the last few years since my BPDex and I confess it had left me with some trust issues until I met an amazing woman who appears to be exactly what I've always wanted in a woman... But. There is something that's niggling away, like something I can't put my finger on and I'm not sure if I'm being too suspicious.

She seemed a bit forward in telling me how much of value I was to her life, told me all about her bad luck and all the guys she's dated were abusive. This was how my ex got me hooked in. It felt like she was love bombing but in a friendship way. She didn't leave me alone and was always texting, inviting me out and stuck to me like glue at work. She's an incredibly attractive woman so of course I don't mind the attention but then it all abruptly stoped then restarted later on. I'm not sure if she's just insecure or if she's a waif type of bpd, she certainly seems similar but not completely. She would flirt a lot and say things like "when are we going on a date" or "how's my boyfriend" etc and so I thought she seemed interested, I asked her out, she said no, she continues to flirt etc. And talks to me about other guys she's seen on tinder and the guys that message her on FB.

I'm a little confused as to whether I've just been played or if she's a waif type and I was falling in to her web My ex was a classic drama queen type, this woman seems the polar opposite that can bring out the white knight in you within 30s


Title: Re: Looking to date again but unsure if I'm being paranoid
Post by: once removed on April 25, 2021, 04:01:51 PM
recovery from a relationship with someone with bpd traits, and dating again will challenge you until you realize these are not things someone does to hook you or draw you in. they are things you are drawn to and what you gravitate toward.

in that regard, its not surprising that you find her similar to your ex.

there are lots of women out there that are exactly like you describe. 99% of them dont have bpd. that doesnt mean theyre necessarily what you are looking for, or want to look for in a woman.

what are you looking for in a woman?


Title: Re: Looking to date again but unsure if I'm being paranoid
Post by: DogMan75 on May 07, 2021, 12:53:04 PM
So are you dating this woman or just interested?