BPDFamily.com

Hi everyone
i have obtained books to figure out on how to cope deal within myself and how to talk to my sister who was hospitalized and diagnosed with borderline, MDD, PTSD and has a history of aDD/ADHD

My sister was in a abusive relationship for six years and I wanted to help her and offered for her to live with me for what I thought was a year to get her back on her feet until she was able to find her own place
I did not ask for money for rent or money for utilities. she covered food expenses for self and at times offered to shop for items i needed.

at time I was living with my fiance  and I was juggling working from home, my relationship to my sister and fiance at that time and own personal needs. 

it turns out she wanted to stay longer and at 1 and four months in was making statements how family helps family she would like to go back to school and stated I offered for her to stay for six years to do so which I never said. she started to make many demands to have her own space and privacy was upset if I asked her to clean after self in kitchen the room stating she was an adult not allowing her to be an adult
she did not want me to ask questions about what she was doing financial situation etc. and would come and go at different times sometimes talking to me and sometimes not. 
 
 I  live in a condo and had a 2 bedroom unfinished basement. she moved to the basement even though I did not think was safe. there is only one exit and I checked in with contractor and  can't get permit to do the basement and since condo rules can't change the structure.
my sister kept places more demands, stating i was invading her privacy controlling and then started to record conversations with me  and my place and then started to say I am abusing her.
when I informed how serious that was and what solutions we could put in place and asked for six months if we could go to counseling together. she started to say I could go a  counselor only if I say to counselor and a group of people I abused her.
I have never physically touched my sister, never called her names.
was feeling great stress over the statements and actions she was doing and felt it was best for us to live in separate spaces
she had a three family home that she was renting out while staying with me and I asked if we could come up with different solutions to help her, our relationship such as
staying at my place part time while working part time close to my home
since she had an option to work from home asked her if she could move into her home and work from home.
my mother offered to take her in part time or full time if we needed a break until can find out ideal solutions for my sister
she did not want to participate in any of the problem solving solutions and did not feel comfortable with her staying in my basement that was not safe for her to live in
I told her I loved her and gave her notice to please start finding alternative place whether to go to her home or find an apartment close by to her workplace
she stated she was going to call the police on me because she had rights to be in my home since she lived there
she then left stating that she was going to call my boss and tell about me, report to my license since i am healthcare provider, sue me block me from any contact and for my family not to say my name in front of her or invite me to events.
my mother is trying hard to appease her love her and she moved into my mother's one bedroom apartment her bedroom and my mother sleeping on the couch and states what she wants from my mother to not ask questions to not go into the bedroom
my mother at times calls me under stress because she does same pattern with her such as stating all her life issues are related to her childhood my mother says sorry and love you and does things for her gives her money a place to say does what she asks but never fills that void or continually talks about the past

I have been in therapy to figure out how to help myself and my family

I am glad to find this support group and any suggestions would be much appreciated.
I am reading all I can and have joined a borderline support group.