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Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD => Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD => Topic started by: Mr. Irrelevant on May 02, 2021, 07:13:40 AM



Title: High Conflict?
Post by: Mr. Irrelevant on May 02, 2021, 07:13:40 AM
I have heard this term used in describing people with BPD; I'm not exactly sure what it means.  My wife is continually creating interpersonal situations of high drama in her life on a daily basis, not just with me but with everyone else from co-workers to family and friends.  It almost seems like she has an insatiable psychological need for conflict and gets relief only by the extreme emotions this generates in others that allows her to somehow express her own feelings.  Is this correct or am I describing another aspect of her illness?


Title: Re: High Conflict?
Post by: kells76 on May 02, 2021, 12:03:36 PM
Hey Mr. Irrelevant, nice to meet you  :hi:

While I'm not sure if "high-conflict person" is an official or diagnostic description; it's a descriptor that I believe author/lawyer/therapist William Eddy coined, and it's pretty apt.

You can find his definition of a high-conflict person here:

https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/hci-articles/who-are-high-conflict-people

Briefly, "HCP's":

-blame others;

-have "all or nothing" thinking patterns;

-have unmanaged emotions; and

-have extreme behaviors.

There isn't necessarily, according to Eddy, a 1-to-1 relationship between HCP's and pwPD's (people with personality disorders), though there can definitely be crossover.

Check out the link to see fuller descriptions of those traits, and let us know if you think it tracks with your pwBPD.

Hope that helps;

kells76