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Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD => Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD => Topic started by: Miamisurvivor on June 26, 2021, 08:10:21 AM



Title: My mother was BPD
Post by: Miamisurvivor on June 26, 2021, 08:10:21 AM
My mother passed away before we could reconcile. We had a huge fight 4 years ago about her hoarding animals. She never sought mental health help. Looking to connect with other daughters of BPD moms.


Title: Re: My mother was BPD
Post by: Turkish on June 26, 2021, 10:02:03 PM
Hopefully, daughters will respond to you... but if you'll permit me:

I'm the only son of a hoarder mother, and when I was 12 and 13, we had quite the menagerie: 50 dogs (all Llasa Apsos, but including 1 Australian shepherd and my first childhood pet, So-big, a cockapoo), 1 sheep that thought she was a dog, 3 goats, half a dozen chickens, 2 geese and 1 duck. That was on 25 acres. A cat or 2 also.

30 years later, in her 50s and 60s, she had reduced the zoo to half a dozen chihuahuas, chickens, two geese and two feral cats.

Around that time, her neighbor had gotten a dumpster as they were remodeling. She told my mom that she could fill up the source they didn't use with junk from her yard.

My mom had a panic attack and heart pain. She took leftover and expired nitro pills that she had kept from her deceased husband. She told the neighbor, "you NEVER tell a hoarder to get rid of their stuff!" And didn't talk to the neighbor for almost 6 months.

BPD is tough enough, but hoarding tendencies are like hyper anxiety. Those aren't easily dealt with to say the least. There isn't "fixing" in the usual sense, but supporting, and often support isn't what we think from a non-disordered point of view.

What precipitated the final huge fight? It sounds like you didn't get closure, and I feel for you. I think a lot of us here have experienced similar.


Title: Re: My mother was BPD
Post by: alskdjfasidjfbv on June 26, 2021, 10:43:45 PM
I am a daughter of a BPD mom. I am not quite sure how to start, but I am a daughter of one.