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Title: Transitioning to independence Post by: Mo Puppy on August 26, 2021, 07:59:07 PM My 18 year old iis set up in an apartment and is making TERRIBLE choices. Do other parents stand back and let their son/daughter learn from their mistakes or intervene?
Title: Re: Transitioning to independence Post by: kells76 on August 26, 2021, 10:38:52 PM Mo Puppy, welcome to the group.
Short answer: as agonizing as it is, yes, many parents do step back and don't intervene in their adult child's poor choices. It is a hard truth that many kids need to hit rock bottom in order to learn about the consequences and outcomes of their decisions. Often, with people with BPD-type traits, helping / "overhelping" them can inhibit their ability or will to mature and help themselves. Of course, every situation is different, and I say this as someone who doesn't have an adult child (it's my husband's kids' mom who has BPD traits). Whenever works for you, want to share a little more about what's going on? You must be agonizing over how to care about your child as you watch the rough transition. It's a good group here with a wide range of experiences and perspectives. I think you'll fit right in as you sound so open to learning. kells76 |