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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup => Topic started by: NonnyMouse on November 04, 2021, 10:11:18 PM



Title: Instagram addiction
Post by: NonnyMouse on November 04, 2021, 10:11:18 PM
My uBPDw is addicted to Instagram. She can spend five hours a day on it. And it is seriously damaging her mental health. She says people are always copying her ideas, "friends" get more likes than her, everyone ignores or hates her,...She changes her profile every few days (evidence of the unstable nature of BPD's identity). She just sits by herself while the rest of the family is active all around her.

Just now she's on it. I am simultaneously: Playing soccer with young son; Who has just pooed in his pants; So I have to take him to the toilet and wipe his bottom; While making dinner; Getting daughter to do practice math tests; While cleaning the dog's teeth. Peak frustration was when trying to stop son eating more chocolate while trying to get rubber dog toothbrush off my finger. (There was a vacuum and it wouldn't come off!) I almost asked uBPDw to help out. But decided best not to.


Title: Re: Instagram addiction
Post by: NotAHero on November 05, 2021, 02:47:55 AM
 I imagine that any younger BP is bound to have an obsession with social media thanks to what you already mentioned - unstable identity. From my experience what you are doing is probably the best. Stay out of it and don’t bring it up or else you risk becoming the target of distortion campaign.

 If you do need her to help with anything around the house or with kids it’s best to ask her without any reference to the social media obsession. With a calm voice try asking for something and hope that she will get distracted and do it. Slowly increase the frequency of asking and hope she won’t be triggered.

  I’m assuming she has average BP trigger threshold. If she has hair thin triggers then it’s best to not even try.


Title: Re: Instagram addiction
Post by: NonnyMouse on November 05, 2021, 12:20:47 PM
She's nearly 50!

Yes, I've learned the hard way not to mention IG.

You are right, I should start slowly asking for her help while she is on IG, at calm times. And not wait until I'm at my wit's end!



Title: Re: Instagram addiction
Post by: rob66 on November 05, 2021, 12:43:31 PM
My ex, who is also in her 50s, was a little preoccupied with Instagram posts, as well, and whether others liked her posts, or not. It didn't seem to unhealthy until after we broke up and I began to understand her condition.