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Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD => Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD => Topic started by: Wickd1 on November 19, 2021, 01:11:31 PM



Title: Vacationing with my Adult child
Post by: Wickd1 on November 19, 2021, 01:11:31 PM
New here!  I believe both my adult daughter and my husband have bpd.

I have to trace to a wedding at a Mexico resort with my daughter next month.

I am looking for support and advice about how to get along with her in this trip.

It will either be a time for us to make good memories together or a goal PLEASE READ (https://bpdfamily.com/safe-site.htm) show.


Title: Re: Vacationing with my Adult child
Post by: Sancho on November 25, 2021, 10:04:47 PM
Hi Wicked1
In my experience going Grey Stone Rock is the best way to spend extended time with a BPD person. It might sound extreme, but it has been the best thing for me.

My rules are:

I don't initiate a conversation unless I have to.
If I do have to I use a minimum of words.
If there is an outburst I stay quiet.

In any situation where BPD person's anxiety is raised, the slightest trigger will set things off. And the person that they dump on will get it, etc.

In my mind the way I do this is I envisage that I am journeying alongside BPD dd. Usually if I was with someone and not talking I would feel uncomfortable etc and chat on. But I have learnt to put my mind on something else when I am with BPD dd.

I think this helps a feeling of separation which helps stop the dumping. So I am not ignoring as such - just thinking about something else. If I am addressed I answer in a pleasant way with few words - and a smile if appropriate.

I hope it is a good time for you!