BPDFamily.com

Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup => Topic started by: Boogie74 on November 30, 2021, 10:05:01 PM



Title: Compares me to television show characters
Post by: Boogie74 on November 30, 2021, 10:05:01 PM
J has begun binge watching Survivor from Season 1.   She becomes emotionally involved in the characters (this isn’t the only time she’s done this in the past) and discusses how various people get under her skin for manipulating and lying to others on the show.   

She has begun to talk to me about how “So and so said this to her and lied to him about XYZ and they hate him for this reason and for manipulating them” and then tangents immediately into how I am a lying manipulating person that would get voted off the island day 1.

At first I made the mistake of responding that it’s a television reality show- that these people aren’t manipulative narcissists (well, maybe they are- who knows?) but I’m not on the show.

I stopped that response immediately and now simply don’t respond to this comparison.

Anyone else have this issue?


Title: Re: Compares me to television show characters
Post by: Jabiru on December 01, 2021, 11:21:34 AM
Sounds like you learned to avoid JADE (https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=139972.0) (justify, attack, defend, explain). That's good.

Personally, I'd have a boundary against verbal abuse of being called a "lying manipulating person" and leave the room if it continued after calmly asking it to stop.


Title: Re: Compares me to television show characters
Post by: NonnyMouse on December 01, 2021, 07:12:16 PM
Not answering the question, but my uBPDw also gets very involved with the TV and movies. She is often very good at spotting who is going to be eventually revealed as the bad guy. But she cannot read any of the classic clues. Such as: this background music means this, that camera angle tells us this, it's too early in the movie for X to happen, and so on.

I really enjoy watching TV with our ten-year old. She understands all the 'codes'!