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Title: Saw a personal psychotherapeutic drawing by my adult daughter Post by: CreativeMom on February 19, 2022, 01:59:48 PM I was trying out a drawing program that my daughter has on her iPad (with her permission), and one of the drawings was a psychotherapeutic exercise to express trauma. It was very disturbing for me to see how she viewed me, her mother, and traumatic moments from her life.
When she was @ 3rd grade going into 4th, I brought a man in to live with us. This man was alcoholic and I found out a few years later, from her psychotherapist, that he'd molested her. We never spoke about the details, but the therapist indicated it was not a rape. Not that that really made it okay. Although she says she forgives me for bringing this man into our home (for 4 years), and I cut him out of our life even before I knew about the abuse, I still feel so incredibly guilty. It makes it hard for me to move on, and even after many years I can't seem to have very close relationships. At the same time, she needs to move out now that she's finished her masters degree (which makes me very proud), and I need to develop my own social life. Title: Re: Saw a personal psychotherapeutic drawing by my adult daughter Post by: Trying2Survive on February 22, 2022, 01:14:14 PM I honestly have no good advice for you. I struggle with guilt for things as small as 'the way I asked her a question' when we end up in a fight. I simply noticed that no one had responded yet and I know when I am feeling alone - no responses can make things worse.
I think there is some forgiveness of yourself that needs to happen here. You did not purposely hurt your daughter. You did not blame or shame your daughter. You apologized and are hypersensitive to this moving forward. I genuinely dont know what more you can do other than time travel. Forgive yourself. |