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Title: READ.AND.REPEAT. a small but powerful piece of advice that saved me. Post by: Learningtolove on February 24, 2022, 06:50:25 AM If you guys are anything like me, then you might find this very SMALL but very POWERFUL piece of advise helpful when you least expect it.
It might not resonate now, but it might, at a time you least expect it, bring you back into reality. So, remember if for later OK? *** WHAT THEY POST ON SOCIAL MEDIA IS LIKELY NOT REPRESENTIVE OF THEIR REALITY*** Have you recently split up with your ex, and now find yourself stalking their social media to try and gauge their feelings (are they even sad, do they even care!)? Are you further down the road, and now spend a lonely night stalking their social media to see how they've moved on? (me, every day.. i'm working on it). Now you've seen a post where they appear to be really happy, and now you're thinking "how could they do this to me, leave me like this (likely destroyed, yet missing them terribly).. and then they look so happy without me?" Well, let me ask you this. - When you were together and they were in crisis, or they were feeling insecure, did their social media posts represent that reality? - Big nope for me - It is likely that putting a false image out to create an 'illusion' that they are FINE and OK without you, probably makes THEM feel better and more powerful? - probably - Is it possible that creating a happy 'image' might shield them from their own inner reality? - definitely So next time you see them making a tiktok of how "happy they are" and that knife plunges straight through your HEART.. stop and breathe, and remind yourself that 'THEIR SOCIAL MEDIA PROBABLY ISNT THE TRUTH". And if you need to, come back here and we will remind each other. Title: Re: READ.AND.REPEAT. a small but powerful piece of advice that saved me. Post by: MobyCloud on February 26, 2022, 01:40:49 AM If you guys are anything like me, then you might find this very SMALL but very POWERFUL piece of advise helpful when you least expect it. It might not resonate now, but it might, at a time you least expect it, bring you back into reality. So, remember if for later OK? *** WHAT THEY POST ON SOCIAL MEDIA IS LIKELY NOT REPRESENTIVE OF THEIR REALITY*** Have you recently split up with your ex, and now find yourself stalking their social media to try and gauge their feelings (are they even sad, do they even care!)? Are you further down the road, and now spend a lonely night stalking their social media to see how they've moved on? (me, every day.. i'm working on it). Now you've seen a post where they appear to be really happy, and now you're thinking "how could they do this to me, leave me like this (likely destroyed, yet missing them terribly).. and then they look so happy without me?" Well, let me ask you this. - When you were together and they were in crisis, or they were feeling insecure, did their social media posts represent that reality? - Big nope for me - It is likely that putting a false image out to create an 'illusion' that they are FINE and OK without you, probably makes THEM feel better and more powerful? - probably - Is it possible that creating a happy 'image' might shield them from their own inner reality? - definitely So next time you see them making a tiktok of how "happy they are" and that knife plunges straight through your HEART.. stop and breathe, and remind yourself that 'THEIR SOCIAL MEDIA PROBABLY ISNT THE TRUTH". And if you need to, come back here and we will remind each other. Love it. Title: Re: READ.AND.REPEAT. a small but powerful piece of advice that saved me. Post by: NotAHero on February 26, 2022, 09:45:00 AM If you guys are anything like me, then you might find this very SMALL but very POWERFUL piece of advise helpful when you least expect it. It might not resonate now, but it might, at a time you least expect it, bring you back into reality. So, remember if for later OK? *** WHAT THEY POST ON SOCIAL MEDIA IS LIKELY NOT REPRESENTIVE OF THEIR REALITY*** Have you recently split up with your ex, and now find yourself stalking their social media to try and gauge their feelings (are they even sad, do they even care!)? Are you further down the road, and now spend a lonely night stalking their social media to see how they've moved on? (me, every day.. i'm working on it). Now you've seen a post where they appear to be really happy, and now you're thinking "how could they do this to me, leave me like this (likely destroyed, yet missing them terribly).. and then they look so happy without me?" Well, let me ask you this. - When you were together and they were in crisis, or they were feeling insecure, did their social media posts represent that reality? - Big nope for me - It is likely that putting a false image out to create an 'illusion' that they are FINE and OK without you, probably makes THEM feel better and more powerful? - probably - Is it possible that creating a happy 'image' might shield them from their own inner reality? - definitely So next time you see them making a tiktok of how "happy they are" and that knife plunges straight through your HEART.. stop and breathe, and remind yourself that 'THEIR SOCIAL MEDIA PROBABLY ISNT THE TRUTH". And if you need to, come back here and we will remind each other. In my case I do wish her happiness and I hope the next host takes care of her. That’s because we have a child together. No matter the pain from being discarded it is my cross to bear and I wish her well. |