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hey everyone. Since about April I've been NC with my ex who dumped me for my own sanity. She had previously blocked me on instagram and I had removed her from everywhere else. However, yesterday I was searching up a new aquintance on instagram and when I began typing my ex's name immediately popped up. Surprised and curious I gave in and looked on her profile just to find out that she had already began a new relationship after telling me she didnt want to date anyone else and that relationships had ruined her life. Is this something she did to get a reaction out of me? I understand the honeymoon phase and all of that but she has so many posts with this guy she just started dating its crazy. She had like 6 pics with him. I don't see why else she would go out of her way to unblock me either. She looks happy enough with this new guy and he seems like an upgrade from me. I also noticed that she still has a video of us together on her account. Am I reading into this too much or could she be baiting a reaction out of me, or even planning to reach out eventually? I feel like i've been driving myself crazy wondering about this and would appreciate you guys' opinions.

Hey whoboyboyy and welcome to the forum.

Seems pretty obvious to me at least that she has done this on purpose so that you can see her new boyfriend/supply and she's hoping to get a rise out of you.

My ex recently did something similar by blocking me on Instagram but constantly updating her WhatsApp status with happy photos with her new boyfriend (she has never used WhatsApp status before so I think it was clearly aimed at me).

The best thing to do I think is not to react, if you are going to become obsessive about viewing her IG then I'd recommend blocking her or at least disabling your account for a while if you are more comfortable to do so.

In my view she is either trying to triangulate you with him or just, somewhat sadistically, see if you will react or get upset.

-getfree

Unfollow and block. You have literally nothing to gain and a lot to lose—your mental energy, your self-worth, your time—by ever looking at her Instagram or anything else again. Take your power back, don't let her toy with you, and be glad that you're free of her chaos.

at the end of the day, you know her better than we do.

your hunch may be emotionally driven, and lord knows i read far too much into what my ex was posting back in the day, but i think more important than what you read into it is how you react, or not to it.

people block others when they feel the need to send a message, and/or erect very high walls. when they unblock, if they do, its because they no longer feel the need for those walls.

i think that it would be a classic mistake to read into it that she is inviting you to contact her, even if she were. people do this, frequently, and then when the unblocked party reaches out, they block them again.

so what i think you can reliably take from it, is that she doesnt feel the need to keep you blocked on this medium. it need not be more, or less than that.

I am going to more or less agree with my teammate OR here, but in more succinct terms. There is no need to overthink this. Don't waste any effort or time on it. It is essentially much ado about nothing. Even if this was an indirect way of communicating...you have to ask yourself does it really matter? Go on about your business and DO YOU.

Cheers and best wishes!

-SC-