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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: lovingmyself1st on June 23, 2022, 12:07:31 PM



Title: Ex is telling people we’re on a “break”
Post by: lovingmyself1st on June 23, 2022, 12:07:31 PM
My ex (who lives with bipolar disorder + symptoms of BPD) ended things with me suddenly last week.  I’ve been getting texts from her closest family & friends letting me know that they are confused by this decision & that they love me. I learned that she is telling them that “we both are taking a break.”

THIS IS NEWS TO ME! Just days before, she told me she could no longer see a future with me.

I’m not going to address it with her. I haven’t reached out to any of her people because it’s not my place to tell them her business. But it’s wild to me that her people are reaching out to me to check in & tell me they love me.

So confusing.


Title: Re: Ex is telling people we’re on a “break”
Post by: SinisterComplex on June 23, 2022, 03:36:35 PM
Get used to this. Unfortunately, this is typical from what I have seen. My buddy's ex said the same crap. Thought they were just going on a break. She offered him an opportunity to divorce and he ran out the door. Granted, he listened to me and allowed me to guide him. But, the point is...it is typical behavior in their reality. Keep in mind that is a warped alternate reality. You are a neurotypical and therefore trying to understand someone whom is wired completely differently. So be kind to you and try not to overthink it.

Cheers and Best Wishes!

-SC-


Title: Re: Ex is telling people we’re on a “break”
Post by: PBandJ22 on June 28, 2022, 07:16:01 AM
Thanks, I'm trying.

It is difficult to wrap my mind around how she could have been telling me how much she loves me & telling her friends & family she was "so happy..." and then just a few days later she can't see a future & wants me to move out as quickly as possible.

She has even replaced the furniture I took (which I brought into the house) - this HAD to be expensive. She doesn't have money laying around for that kind of thing.

Everything feels so impulsive. I have a lot of empathy for what she's going through, and also I recognize it's impossible for me to fully understand.


Title: Re: Ex is telling people we’re on a “break”
Post by: PBandJ22 on June 28, 2022, 07:17:00 AM
I meant to say - **Thanks, I'm trying to do this also