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I've been focused on creating boundaries for the consistent double binds and unconscious traps my uBPDw communicates.

I think of it like this:

1. Noticing the pattern
2. Being aware of the double bind in real time
3. Action:
- Boundary A - Ignore, step away
- Boundary B - Confront the violation
4. Repeat and practice the boundary

I'm curious what approach you have found successful? Anything creative? It seems unproductive to call out the inconsistencies in their communication.

Any interesting BPD double binds that you've experienced?

Here is a good double bind overview I found:

The double message is a series of conflicting or opposite messages given in any number of ways and insidious combinations that sets up a dilemma for the person or people receiving them. In other words, the dilemma is that no matter which message I respond to, I will remain in conflict with the other message. The other message will then be the cause of a problem that will cause me to experience conflict, loss or devaluation. This is classically the “lose/lose” scenario. Let’s break it down.

The double message – the communication of two opposite or conflicting messages that are either given in sequence (sometimes repetitive alternating sequences) or given simultaneously.

The receiver has the dilemma of not knowing which one represents the truth or the authentic opinion of the person sending the message.

As the receiver attempts to respond to one of the messages, the opposite message is utilized to gain the upper hand by making the responder wrong for the one they have chosen.