BPDFamily.com

Thanks all for the wisdom and support in the past.
I am now more than 2 years out from the last contact with my very violent BPD ex.  She has a BPD diagnosis from at least 3 therapists but she, as of last I knew, does not accept the diagnosis.  While we were together, she attempted suicide Numerous times, has come at me and her family members with kitchen knives or hammers - once while I was sleeping.  She punched numerous holes in walls, smashed plates, glasses and laptops, damaged my car and house and blamed me for all the times she was hurt by others in the past.   I was very grateful to get out of it and out of contact with no lasting injuries.   She has not reached out in a couple of years.
I am now for the first time exploring a new relationship and finding myself getting very concerned that she may somehow hear that I'm in a good place and a healthy relationship and come find us to do damage.  I'll go out of my way not to broadcast my new relationship but am not going to hide.  In your experience, how likely do you think it is that she will still be seeking "retribution" and look to disrupt my life and/or harm my new partner?  Or do you think she's likely "over me" and moved on?  I know it's a bit of an unfair question, but would really like to hear your thoughts, comments and experiences. Thank you!

That's a very tough question and I'm not sure if anyone here could answer that accurately.  Do you have any idea if your ex is in a relationship at this point?  Or had failed relationships since you guys broke up?  If so, their anger/blame has probably moved onto the next person.  There's really no way to know though without talking to someone in her circle of friends/family.

Thanks for your thoughts.  Agree that it is impossible to really know without talking with her friends / family. However, she cut off also from all of our mutual friends and is in a new job.  That said, her field involves travel, likely to my. part of the world. I don't know or know of anyone in her present orbit.  I believe she is several states away, but have no way of knowing for sure.  I'm looking for others' experiences and observations.  What happened in their situations...  With no solid info, I'm just looking for insight...

I’ve read story’s about other exBPD trying to reach out years later, so it’s definitely possible. There’s way too many factors to make an accurate statement but it’s a possibility. I’m sure you know pwBPD aren’t exactly predictable in their warped thinking and emotional fluctuations so I don’t doubt some would try to reassert themselves back into your life. I wouldn’t worry if I was you though, just be aware there’s a possibility.