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Title: Struggling to connect Post by: SSSO86 on April 24, 2023, 10:05:38 PM Hi there. My SO has BPD. We have been through a lot of ups and downs already. Her disorder hasn't helped. Over the last couple months she has gotten less affectionate. I'm aware that a relationship with someone who has BPD is difficult. I'm wondering if there are any tips to
A.) Trying to help bring her back a bit... And B.) Help me to focus on the good because I'm begining to lose hope... She says she loves me... but man, u miss her like crazy. We only get a couple good days together a week so I really hold on to them. Title: Re: Struggling to connect Post by: Jabiru on April 26, 2023, 02:24:22 PM Hi and welcome :hi: You're right. It's like a special needs kind of relationship.
A) I'd say focus on what's reasonable and in your power: You can try to avoid being invalidating and exercise healthy limits in your relationship. It can be hard to watch your loved one experience emotional dysregulation, but you can only do what you can do. I hear it depends on the person, but my uBPD wife seems to do best when we give each other an hour of separate time to calm down. Talk with her and see what works for both of you. Also check the Tips menu at the top of the page. B) Ultimately it's up to you to weigh the options and decide what you want to do in your life. There are many success stories here, so it's possible depending on circumstances. Good luck and keep us updated. |