BPDFamily.com

I wrote a big long post, but just feel so tired, so deleted it, but can’t delete the actual post, just remove my words and write this instead. I’m very very tired and worn out from years of trying so hard and walking on eggshells….

 :hug:

"Eroded" is a word that comes to my mind when I think about years of exposure to BPD traits and behaviors. It just wears you down -- I get it.

I hope you get to take a break somehow and somewhere today.

« erroded » is exactly how i feel.
Like i have aged 10 years in only a couple .

i know the thing to do for you and mims-take care if yourself.. mych easier said than  done !.. but: small things, like when you see you are definitely captive of your thoughts, yhe negative loop, and a victim of your kid’s behavior or words: take a break from it -don t react-go walking-meditating-gardening-whatever « fills  » you up a bit
hugs

I understand the depth of this word. I am tired too...
But it is nice to come to a place where people actually can relate to and empathize with how you feel.
Sending you some strength and hoping you can find something to make you smile - or just the ability to turn off the tiredness somehow...for just a little bit.
Lots of smart people on here who care and understand...that's more than I had a few days ago.
So I am still tired but less alone.

Kells76 and Clarity,
I hope you had some good peaceful days these past weeks  :hug:
I did.. then if course it comes back with vengence almost :( I am trying to help myself with practice, mindfulness , etc. We most definitely need to care for ourself..
My daughter’s situation is eating me alive.
I wish I could sleep right through the holidays and wake up in the Spring.
I would liketo talk to her-mostly to have the chance to talk abt her cocaine use which I thought was done completely-but turns out not :(
And I don’t know how to talk to my own child  . I feel so anxious  that I had a terrible migraine episode last night which lasted 2 hours. I am a mess today.
I have all resources for treatment, etc. but what good does it do if we can’t talk, right?
She has a therapist, she has new meds… she goes to AA, sometimes NA..and yet.. And here I am , literally suck with sadness and anxiety.. she knows about the risk of fentanyl.
And she helped a friend a few weeks  ago by giving him narcane.. which she bought for him to help him …
sorry to vent so much- I guess I need a compassionate ear- my “faith” community is not helping me rn… not clicking for me.
husband not able  to talk long abt it.. he has to deal with his own feelings i guess.
Take care everyone.

Eroded is such an accurate description.  I feel that, like there isn't much left of me from trying to deal with daughter 29 and her daily crisis.  So good to know I am not alone.