BPDFamily.com

Good morning everyone.. I was wondering if anyone here has come to realize they have experienced sexual trauma as a result of their exBPD and how did you treat it? I guess I didn't realize how damaging these relationships can be when trying to move on post-discard. I have met a really great, healthy, girl and it seems as though I am having some trouble with intimacy with her. Some symptom, I suppose, could be attributed to my age (41), while other areas seem to be emotional and psychological. I guess I didn't realize the trauma associated with this sort of discard and disappearing act until I began dating someone new. Any thoughts here on the subject?

The end of these relationships do send the non disordered partner into depression- loss of sex drive/ libido is a symptom of depression.
Apart from that , all kinds of trauma associated with end of the relationship may leave you feeling insecure for a while. There’s also the possibility that you were objectified throughout the sexual relationship with the pwbpd.
As a female I know the part of my brain that desires intimacy is in shut down and I don’t foresee this changing anytime soon.

Look back a few months, several of us had a really good discussion about this very topic.

I was sexually traumatized by my ex, I won't go into what she did here unless you'd like me to (I know that seeing similar experiences can be helpful and am happy to). I found that I was actually scared of being with her sexually. We went the last 9 months or so without being together that way except for once, which once again was hurtful and shocking, so I never tried again.

You are not alone, there are several of us here. I'm out of my relationship 3 years now, and am terrified to even try to have a new partner. I'm actually worried she ruined me sexually. Now, I have childhood sexual abuse in my past (which she knew about, which makes her behavior worse) so I may be an outlier.