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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup => Topic started by: Peepou23 on April 21, 2024, 04:59:50 PM



Title: How do I approach this situation and get her back
Post by: Peepou23 on April 21, 2024, 04:59:50 PM
Hi.

So I made a previous post explaining my situation that I am in currently. To sum it up, me and my SO with BPD had a rough and abrupt break-up. A month after I tried getting her back and found out she already found someone else, most likely a rebound. Which in this case is proven true. They already ended things after a month or so. My question now is, how do I get her back? I blocked her on Instagram, but I have other social medias to contact her, but prefer not doing that. I would rather meet her in person and invite her to a friendly coffee. I already evaluated my situation after 2 months have now passed, my life goes on, I am focusing on myself and believe I improved myself a bit, but I want to get her back because I think we are a good fit for eachother, even though she can be problematic. I want to work on our problems together. So my question is how should I approach her? Is it too risky? Any advice would be appreciated greatly. Thank you.


Title: Re: How do I approach this situation and get her back
Post by: Pook075 on April 21, 2024, 07:23:37 PM
Hey Peep!

Unfortunately, there's no magic formula for getting someone with BPD back.  They have a whole lot of insecurities built up and overcoming that from a distance is very tough.  The only way forward is reaching out, asking to talk, and seeing what happens.

As others mentioned before, your approach when speaking with her and validating her feelings will play a huge role in rebuilding trust.  It may be a slow process and there's so many variables involved, including the other stuff going on in her life and where she's at emotionally.  All you can do is open communications or wait for her to do that.

If it helps, I have a cousin that's somewhere in the B-cluster who walked out on the love of her life in their 20's.  They met by chance almost 20 years later and ended up marrying, with a great love story.  So it's never too late and there's always hope.