BPDFamily.com

Hello everyone, I am a 25 year old male seeking a support group for those with BPD/ love ones afflicted by BPD. My mother was diagnosed when I was about 12 years old and she believes the illness runs in our family; I could not know as I have no experience or connection with them. As I get older I wonder more whether or not I have BPD myself or if my outbursts are more an effect of learned behavior as I was mainly raised by my mother. It would be great to find an in person setting where I can sit with a group and listen to others experience and relate mine to them, preferably lead by medical professional. I am willing to contribute to the group financially, however times are tight so a free group session would be preferable. I have never participated in an online forum such as this so maybe this site will be good enough but again it would be more powerful to connect with a group in person! Thanks to all ahead of time to any replies, any information would be greatly appreciated.

I am currently attending personal therapy sessions weekly, I recently began and plan to continue with that for the foreseeable future; still I think something like this would be a great extra-curricular activity and look forward to being in contact with this forum.

I do appreciate in person is best for many, but with specialist groups of this nature, online tends to be the mostly likely option, e.g. video conferencing. Also it's safer so many like to stay anonymous. Often these are free (no room rental etc...)

PS in my country, safeguarding is an issue - folk with a Personality Disorder often try to sabotage such events - for kicks (and worse). That's easier to control online.

Some members here have used 12- steps ( I believe they are in person groups) and recommend it. I don’t know if they exist in my country so I haven’t tried yet.
I’ve also heard of CoDa groups which are mainly online and plan to join one myself.

Dialectical behaviour therapy (DBT) is considered cost effective therapy for anyone who struggles managing strong emotional dysregulation. E.g. if you weren't taught that as a child (or have BPD). I was lucky, my father taught us good skills.

BPD is often misdiagnosed as it has cross over symptoms with so many other issues such as neurodiversity and PTSD.  Self awareness is the main thing.Your post suggest you and your mother are very self aware, those that aren't tend to remain undiagnosed and bully others. This is why the health sector has moved to using "spectrums" like the  DSM-5 scale (30% of the population) rather than labels.

The best approach I've seen is "treat the symptoms, not the label". Ironically, a lot of health workers are on the DSM-5 scale and undiagnosed, and "unconscious bias" comes to play. E.g. I've seen senior consultants make very prejudicial statements (not out of ignorance) which is a sign of a lack of self awareness or attempt to manipulate. So learn "Best practice" from those that clearly demonstrate it themselves, often other suffers can't, but they can give you moral support or good book references. Hope that helps x