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Tomorrow will make a week of NC and I miss her... .ughhh.  Anyway, my BPDx was trying to manipulate me to get her pregnant. She would whisper seductively for me to finish inside of her. She would say she wasn't ovulating... .that it was OK. She would lock her legs around me and I swear on one occasion she was self inserting while I was in the bathroom. There were several times when I did climax inside of her... .However when I didn't I began to notice she was becoming more demanding about it. Her face would change and become demonic and frightening. I was so innocent, I was caught up in the feelings of love and companionship and she was seething mad. It was insanely disturbing. She would catch herself and calm down a bit... but her effort in doing so was evident. When I did climax inside she would be so happy... she would hold on to me and tell me how much she loved me. That happiness was always fleeting... .hours later she was hating me, and would disappear. She would challenge my love endlessly although she could be in the earliest stages of pregnancy... .lol no matter how I play back the tape there is no answer it doesn't make sense... mental illness is the answer. And I miss her? who is more mental? ?

oops  I meant to post this in " disengaging" forum... .sorry.

I have to respond to this one... .even though the roles are reversed in my case. My exBPDbf started talking about me getting pregnant... .one day, out of the blue while we were driving somewhere in his truck he looks at me and says "Yup... I've been thinking about it and I think we should try and get you pregnant". Well... .I didn't know if I should burst out laughing or open the door and jump out of a moving vehicle... .this was about a year and a half ago... .I was 45 YEARS OLD at the time... .sheesh. He doesn't have any kids of his own and I have a 13 year old son... .I am done having babies... .not to mention... .I am OLD! What the hell... .are we John Travolta and Kelly Preston? After this initial conversation... .(I kind of chuckled, said I already have a kid, he's 13 and things are getting easier... .no more baby stage) he kept at it... .every once in awhile he would say... .I think you need to get rid of your IUD... .give your body a rest... .you've had it for too long... .blah, blah, blah. Shut up Buddy... .I see the writing on the wall, no way would I want to have kids with you even if I was younger and more energetic!

This isn't exactly the same thing, but my uBPbf suggested we have babies, even though a) I was 47 at the time and b) he'd had a vasectomy. In this case, he was tapping into my occasional regret that I'd never had kids. It was in the beginning, one of the things that made me think, "Wow, what a great guy! Incredible that he would offer this, even though I feel too old to have kids." Right. He was just poking around to find my vulnerable places.

NPDx liked to remind me that I wasn't a "real woman" because I didn't credit about marriage and I've never wanted kids. Like, ever.

BPDx didn't have a vasectomy but also didn't want to use protection. If I'd been a bit more naive... .

This is a really common form of abuse I think. If you fall for it they can mess with your head for the rest of your life.

Thank God... .she didn't get pregnant. I am 45 and have a 10 yr old daughter... .it would have made my life extremely difficult.

Time to stop having unprotected sex?  |iiii

My ex would say he definatly didnt want any children. he would scream and say If I got pregnant hed make me have an abortion. We always used protection. He left me for three years without a word during all that time. During that time he was telling people bragging that he thought I got pregnant by him right before he left me. He returned to me after the three years out of the blue, first thing he asked me was if we had a child. This puzzles me, heres someone that strongly didnt want kids, but tells people he thinks hes got one and then returns thinking that. I wonder what would have happend if I did have one. My guess is he would have screamed sayin it was my fault and now i wrecked his life.