BPDFamily.com

I work in NYC and on the morning of 9/11, I watched Mohammed Atta's plane fly directly into the World Trade Center. Couldn't really comprehend what I was seeing and rushed to my desk to call my pwBPD-ex.

"Are you watching this," I said.

"Yeah... .and?" was her response.

"Well, THIS is kind of serious... .THIS is not good... there's no way to get out of the city and we have no clue what's going to happen next," I said.

Her response? Laughter... .the most hideous cackling laughter that I've ever heard.

"Give me a break," she said. "You're such a damn alarmist."

"No, kid, I'm literally watching people jump off the building and you're laughing about it? What the HELL is wrong with you?

"I've got more important problems... .talk to you later."

Stunned doesn't even begin to describe my thinking and I'll never forget it.

BIH

Wow. That's pretty messed up. It's amazing how the same people who can so quickly make a mountain out of a molehill can just as easily make molehills out of mountains. If it ain't about them, it's no bid deal, no matter how big a deal it is.

During one of our "breakups"... .I called him because I missed him only for him to tell me: "my life works so much better without you in the picture", "when I'm with you things go wrong in my life" and how he "found" a woman who was his mirror and shared his same quirks. Talk about BALLS OF STEAL. It was the beginning of his triangulation (read definition) (https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=121673.0).

It was probably the most hurtful thing he's ever said to me. I felt utterly ultra shtty that day.

The funny thing was we spent the next 5 days together in bliss.

HG

Speaking about a woman I knew for a fact that my BPD partner had only just met at a party two weeks before: "I've fallen deeply in love with X and just know that she's my soul mate. Here's your key back. When can I come get my stuff?"

(And that was the end of our two year relationship - two days before we had been speaking of moving in together. Classic BPD moment - only I didn't know anything about BPD back then. Wish I had.)

*BOGGLE*

during our relationship her best friend broke up with her boyfriend after a 4 year relationship. my ex was at first very supportive of her(I was absolutely amazed about that). after 2 months my ex became 'very very good' friends with the new love of her best girlfriends ex (aaah... .BPD and the people they meet ). then she breaks up with me and makes out with her best girlfriends ex and now her new 'very very good' friend's boyfriend and afterwards laughingly tell's them about it.

they both got pissed off and would not talk to her anymore and she pretends to be the victim. two days later she re engages with me and tells me the story laughing, and gets mad at me for feeling upset ubout her having been with another man. and for weeks every time we met someone she would tell the whole story again ending with "i don't understand what all the fuss is about, it wasnt that wrong?"

how humiliating... .

When my DH was early into his marriage with The Dark Princess, he was angry and had reached his limit with her constant and flagrant infidelities.  He sat her down and had a serious conversation about separation.  At the time, their children were about 4 and 2.

Her reply?

"If you ever leave me, I'll burn down the house with the children in it."

And he knew she was capable of doing so.  They were legally married for 33 years (the final 14 years separated).

The adult children will never know she said that.

said... .

"god spoke to me. he says that you are poison in my life and he showed me how i'm going to die. i'm going to drown."

did... .

called my place of employment and said that i beat her and put her in the hospital. when that didn't work, she tried the same dance with the police. they brought me in and did an investigation. i walked with no charges.

Said:

well, screamed, more like: "GET USED TO IT!" when I called him on being blatantly abusive.


Did:

I had lost my job (in part due to being unable to function as a result of his unrelenting emotional abuse), and he had broken up with me, but was still speaking with me via the phone in order to chastise me about what a horrible person I am.

I made a melodramatic comment about being in so much pain I wanted to die. A messed up and manipulative thing to say, to be sure.

He, without ceremony or further discussion, hung up on me, called 911, and had me hauled of to the psych ward of a NYC hospital at 4:00 am for being "suicidal".

I was released like an hour later, but I will never forget having like four cops show up at my door and telling me that due to the nature of his tip they were legally obligated to transport me, and if I didn't cooperate they would be forced to arrest me.

I guess he showed me.

Even though we are not in contact and I don't expect to ever hear from him again, sometimes I worry he will make another call like that out of pure hatred and spite.

Wow!  I hope not.  Mine really did have a break down and we took him to the hospital.  When he got better, that is why he left me saying there was nothing wrong with him.  He thought that the TV was talking to him and his blood pressure was 209/114.

1. When one of her many online 'friends' went through my internet history and twisted the truth - she believed him, not me, her boyfriend. No mention of how wrong it was to go amateur detective on someone you don't even know... .

2. When another one trapped me in a conversation about how he cheated on me with her (a lie), lured me into saying bad things and then twisting the story so it would look like I was the bad guy so she would break up with me - she believed him, not me, her boyfriend.

3. When she told me that, within a week of our break up, she met her soulmate and that she never really loved me but was in it for the attention - that really hurt. But the truth prevailed when the soulmate rang my online doorbell and told me she was crazy as fvck, heheh.

We haven't talked for over a year now and thanks to her I grew a lot stronger and know now to not ignore my feelings and the red flags so easily. And if it wasn't for our break up I would not have met my true soulmate, who keeps showing me what real love is about. :)

Hmmmm... .where do I start.  Things he said:

- I'm not going anywhere in public with you

- You'd make a terrible mom

- Your eggs are going bad

- Who would marry you?

- You don't know anything about anything

- You're grossly skinny

- You are not attractive

- You're marginally attractive

- You're crazy

- Your career and education are fake and don't matter

- I don't revere you - you're interesting and all but that's about it

- You look like a successful tranny

- You're 'wrong' as an entity

What he did:

- never offering to pay for anything

- regularly yelling and hanging up on me when he thought I was taking too long to arrive at his house

- ignoring me out of the blue (for days at a time) and leaving me to figure out why he was mad at me

- Constantly commenting on the hotness of other women (something I found creepy instead of threatening)

- Denying his interest in me, maintaining that I chased him relentlessly (He pursued me and I didn't even like him at first - should have trusted my first instinct)

- Accusing me of being crazy and threatening to end the relationship when I question the motives behind the things he did and said

- Constantly bringing up ex-girlfriends and how much better they were in bed than I was

- Telling me to 'deal' when I mentioned how much his personal digs and other verbal abuse hurt me

- Calling my relationship with my family sick and co-dependent

How did I allow myself to be treated so terribly?  I want him to PAY and PAY DEARLY for the pain he caused me.  I have no more love for this man and I don't care if he lives or dies, but it's the anger that's really hard to let go of.  I know he'll never have remorse for what he did.

Said:  "You better ~ing treat me with respect or I'm not going to the Goddamned funeral!  Who do you think you're talking to?"  This is when I told her I didn't want to stop and pick up breakfast at Sonic because I didn't want to be late to my best friend's funeral - where I was giving the eulogy.

Did:  Left me at a hotel room in New York to be with a "friend of a friend" on the night we got engaged.  She left the hotel room at 7:30 PM and didn't come back until about 6:30 in the morning.  I was worried sick.  Found out later that she made out with this dude at some bar and even though I can't confirm it, I'm pretty sure she went back to his place and had sex with him.  I can't believe I didn't have the guts to end things right then and there.

How did he ever find time to date both of us at the same time? lol  

They never deserved to have even known us.

worst

thing I can remember him saying;(after finding him in bed with married x girlfriend & throwing me down the stairs))"I did it because you are boring and I don't love you.Your body is an old peoples home."(One week later he was crying  :'(over the phone and chased me half way around the world to reconcile) |iiii

"If you want to stay in this relationship,you need to learn to bury your head in the sand."

"I am an alpha male "(proudly)"and it's my way or the highway."

"All your previous partners never loved you.They just used you."(he only ever met one of my xs,one time.I never discussed my past for fear of him throwing things back in my face-at least I had that right!)

"We cant work because you are too opinionated "(I had an opinion )

"You are not special.There have been many before you who were more compatible,but I screwed it up with them because the timing wasnt right"

When asked by our T "What do you like about her(me)" he replied"she makes an effort to look after me"(he is 48!)

"What!We are out of bananas?You had better start making an effort around here or you will be out.I have had enough!" (he woke me at 3am for this one!)

After failed IVF attempt (the day of the pregnancy result).When HE was sulking "I can't stand you""leave me alone.I don't love you enough to stay with you without a baby".Like I had done this to HIM on purpose.

Weeks later he wrote his first post on Facebook ."I am finally in love and ridiculously happy.I have finally met the woman who has been able to knock down all the walls that this hard man had put up over the years.I am so lucky.Can't wait for you all to meet her".  ?

The worst thing he ever did was re-engage me ,over & over again.I think that last one finally put an end to that. 

Sorry,I couldn't just list one.There are hundreds all equally as f"d up!

The most f'd up thing that I still find so hard to fathom, is basically the way in which he just packed up all of his stuff & walked out, just 7 months after marrying me & feeling such love & desire for the whole life commitment.  The fact that anyone can just seem to so easily turn their back on that sort of commitment, like it was just some sort of playground fling, is what keeps me stuck alot of times.  It seems so surreal, unreal. 

And then the fact that he recently (8 months after he left) switches in the space of about 3 or 4 weeks, from declaring that he loves me, to then "I don't love you anymore".  All seems so insanely f'd up.  It seems so surreal, all of it.  But I'm learning about the way that the BPD behaviour just does not make much sense.   ? ? :'(

I was just making a list when I read this thread:

Strangest things she said:

-"Everybody who left me, I made sure their lives were destroyed."

-"I wouldn't mind getting raped. Getting raped is highly underrated."

-"My front lobe decides whether I respond to a text message or not."

-"I once burnt a building down."

-"Sometimes I masturbate the whole day in bed."

-"My brother is into erotic asphyxiation"."

-"When I was 14 I had sex with a 12 year old girl."

-"You remind me of the killer of Nataly Holloway."

-When I said my daughter is ill, she replied "I am not interested in that".

-When I was on a business trip and told her I also visited my mother she said "ah, how sweet little boy is going back to his mommy".

-While she owned me $500 I asked her once if she has $20 on her because I ran out of cash. Her respons was "hmmm, well ok I think I can trust you".

-When sitting in a restaurant a big size waitress came. After the waitress introduced herself, she said, "I am sorry I cannot understand walrus".

-When going out I went to the bathroom. When I came back she sat on a stranger hugging. When she saw me, she pointed to me laughing: "ah, look he is jealous"

-After a visit from a bailiff because of debt, she blamed eveything on a friend, because that friend once said that she shouldn't be so strict with paying bills.

The summit:

-I was leaving town and she could borrow the car the day before, I only needed a ride to the airport the next day. She didn't show up and was unreachable.

I hope that you are not with this person anymore.

Day after terminating a pregnancy "I am so proud of you that you chose me over the life of a child"

"you didn't make me feel like a man, so I screwed someone else - but your body felt better"

"you make me lunches and dinners and it makes me feel less like a man"... ok that's just wacky.

Mine told me ominously early on that we would be "under attack".  

I asked what he meant by that, apparently he was referring to demonic forces.  He said our r/s was sanctified by God, and because of that we would be under attack.  

Oookay... .then again, he didn't tell me those demonic forces would be operating through him.  

Yep, I'd like a side of paranoid potatoes and a delusional buttermilk biscuit with my Bucket o' Crazy, Extra Crispy style, please.  

What a load.  How I swallowed that schlock I can't imagine.  Guess I have to plead temporary insanity due to "love".  Sheesh, if I ever believe a line like that again, get the net.  

I suppose his marriage fresh out of the gate of the demise of our r/s is sanctified by God as well.   The Big Guy must need a program to keep up with all the sanctifying going on... .:)

I have hesitated to post on this thread because my H has done/said some very f"d up things but I continued to stay, hence my posts on "trauma bonding". So, I have some shame in admitting... .

When I met my H, I had a 2 year old son. My (now h) hated him. Thought he was "weak". One day, while my son was napping, my H decided in a sex moment to tie me up. I thought it was something he wanted to pleasure me?, or show me? But within a few minutes, he said, "now what are you gonna do when that brat starts crying mommy?" I was so confused, I laid there trying to understand his 'game'. Then, he left the room. Minutes passed... .a half hour... .I was tied up, and getting mad, and worried... .my son was in the next room, no sound... .sleeping?... I began to panic... .ripped off my ties in a rage... .and there was my baby sleeping soundly, and my H (then bf) passed out on the couch!

GOODDD! How FKD up was I!

 One time during an argument she told me that she never loved me and that I was just a game from the beginning... .  :'(. She says that in her past she would devalue someone like that to push them away, and that she would just move on, but she couldn't do that with me.

She kept texting me later that night to say how sorry she was, but she did thing like this constantly. It seemed to happen when I had plans or when I was drinking. She didn't want to be around people that drink, so she would never come out. It was awesome that this was my birthday celebration with my friends, but she wouldn't come out for it.

My birthday was never anything special. Since in 05 we had the calling hours for my brother in law that was killed in Iraq on my birthday I get depressed around that time. I was hoping this year was different since I had someone to share it with. Nope... .on my birthday I caught her lying to me about another guy she was texting, and that is what really started to un-ravel the relationship. Don't get me wrong I don't care who she is friends with, but don't hide it from me, and don't lie to me about it. If you do that obviously your intentions aren't pure.

So many things.  You lose track of what is and isn't f#cked up.  That is what becomes in itself so f#cked up. 

My wife has told me she settled for me a few times.  That I disgust her numerous times.  That I paled in comparison to a man she would eventually cheat on me with.  Only to revert and say she was wrong for saying that.  :)  Yeah.   

That she should never had kids with me.  That she will never have another child with me.

One of the coldest things I think she has said has been, "Are you going to lay in bed and cry all day like you like to do."  referring to when she would say she wants a divorce or she is breaking up with me.  I used to cry and be depressed... .naturally.  She would say this after telling me she wanted a divorce.  Not anymore.  I swear I won't shed another tear for her.  There are positives to losing her.  :)   

No real winner, but to me they are all equally f#cked up. 

Everything lost it's power, I forgot everything when she said one simple statement that practically killed me, stunned me so much that it was crossing the line for me.  The topic of rape is a hard one for me, as I've known close people who have gone through it (even my ex herself). In an effort to shut me up, because she was pointing out all my faults while telling me to stop or shut up whenever I brought up a single fault and reason why I was leaving her, she said this:

"I felt like I was being raped. I kept saying stop and you wouldn't stop."

She... .used... .THAT against me... .knowing it would affect me, and it did. I was speechless, I was... .I was punched in the gut. Shaken by it. Nonetheless, it was the line that made me realize there was no saving this relationship. Ironically, it was that very thing that she said that made me go NC with her.  I'm not sure what's more F*cked up, that statement, or her reaction to when I confronted her about it. She acted like it was nothing, she said she just wanted to get me to stop talking or something like that... .

Thinking back, I could stomach the insults, the accusations, the pain, the lies, everything... .but that is the one thing that I can't possibly stomach. You can't possibly imagine just how shaken that left me and how shaken I am thinking about it all this time later... .

Once after begging me not to leave her, and promising change, we had make-up sex. Immediately after the sex, while putting clothes on she said;

"Besides if you did leave me you would always have to think about me doing that with someone else."

Not the worst of things or events with her, but displays the mind manipulation. Sick.

For me a lot of the remarks first stunned me and later thought how truely mind boggling they were. A recent example after I discovered her drug addiction is much worse than I thought and also discovered how she used mutual money for that:

Me: obviously your drug is the most important thing for you, more important than anything else.

Her: You insult and hurt me deeply when you use my drug habit against me.

These remarks can be said after hours of a normal conversation. Thats the thing, you think you have a normal conversation and then all of a sudden BOOM! I makes me wonder what really goes on in her mind. I think I only see a glimpe of it.


I left her, but still have unfinished business. During a recent visit I saw her front porch was completely full with dog poo.

Once after putting LOL in a text I was told how stupid and inconsiderate I was... .because he didn't like LOL

After having a short text conversation with him in regards to something, where he was willingly participating in the conversation, he told me that I had to stop texting him and trying to take up all his time at work while he was supposed to be working.  This after he just told me he was sitting on the couch at work playing the guitar (his job is not that of a musician).

His dog had cancer and needed to go to the vet and he proceeded to berate me and tell me how selfish I was because I wouldn't take the dog to the vet.  Sad to say that I would have had I not been taking my final exams and preparing to gradute from college that week.

This should have been a red flag for me.  Early on in the relationship he was going away to a bachelor party and I was going out of town with my mom.  In a conversation before he left I said "have a great weekend and don't do anything too crazy".  He went into a rage about why would I say things like that?  Hmmmmm well because I thought it was a nice thing to say?

And the final straw, was when he told me that he wasn't texting me anymore and that I could talk to him on facebook if I needed him.  He texted me 3 days later wanting something (dont' remember what) and I asked him how his week had been since I hadn't talked to him (I refuse to have to communicate with someone I'm dating through fb) and he went into a rage again and starting telling me I was bi-polar and had voices in my head.  I had already come to the conclusion that he had BPD by then so when I asked him if he was projecting his mental illness on to me and had he ever heard of BPD, it didn't help (I knew it wouldn't, but I was angry and wanted a stab) and that was the start of NC for us since I immediately blocked him for any sort of contact!

I thought I'd read it all, there couldn't be any worse abuse. But this post opened my eyes and even made my jaw drop quite a few times. The things that some have said to you are not only abusive and hateful, they're downright evil. You have been through living Hells with your xBPDs.

All of the textbook earmarks for BPD are here, and MORE. Apathy, lack of empathy, invalidation, cruelty, self-hatred.  I dislike saying this about another human, but some of these people don't deserve life. They are vile and inhuman. They're human vampires that suck the lives out of decent people and take up space on this planet.

These people are shining examples behind the concept of eugenics.  

- Held S5 down on the floor and would squirt an unprescribed medication called Haldol down his throat, referring to it as his calm down medicine.

- Yanked a tooth brush from S5's mouth with such force that she pulled his front tooth loose which required a trip to the oral surgeon.

- Forged a letter on her T's stationary in which she diagnosed me NPD, which she intended to submit to court - but then her lawyer dumped her.

- After I remarried she contacted my wife's place of business repeatedly attempting to get her fired from her job.

- Kicked our kids out of her house and left me to tell them that she said she didn't want them to live there, then asked for them back the day child support was due.

There are several worse things I can't bring myself to write about here.

There are so many but the one that stands out is... .As a teenager, I had placed a baby for adoption. Its not something I super proud of but I'm not ashamed. I know I did the right thng at the time. I told my ex and he spent the next year, screaming that I give my own children away. I think those statements hurt the worse

Hmm... .let's see... .shortly after trying to seduce my mother (and blaming it on me, because I had been sick the night before and too tired to "fill his needs" he got all paranoid (including thinking I was giving hand signals to a hidden camera) got into a "head-banging" habit that was not related to music:P and then went psycho and beat the crap out of me for trying to take my daughter out when he was scaring us... .  Yeah, I picked a real winner thereXD lol  And I have the scars to remind me every day:P

Here's one of the many that come to mind.

upbdw told the oldest of our four sons that I was having sex with the older of my two sisters. This was on the ocassion of me traveling to the funeral of the younger sister who had fallen ill suddenly and had passed away.

Just an example what she has done to all four of the kids' minds and souls... .

Probably calling the police on me for abandoning our kids at home... .the only problem was that I left the house before she did. She tried to explain why I should be arrested, but to no avail. When the police left, she looked at my 5-year-old daughter and said, "This is all your fault!"

This is all mind-boggling! The lists are unbelievable to someone who doesn't know about BPD.

I guess the worst (for me) was when my ex decided not to come to be with me when my mother was dying (he was usually pretty good about family things) and then later (when he was with new gf) said he thought I had done the right thing during this period. In other words, it was not he who cheated on me while I was attending to my mother, it was me who abandoned him and he found another gf to mirror. I hope that makes sense.

Diotima

The worst thing my BPDw ever said to me was after a year of no sex at all, I brought the subject up. Here's what she said while looking me straight in the eye.

"I will no longer be 'servicing' you."

And them she just walked away.

23 years of marriage, it hit me to the core.

Sir5r

I know.  It is like you can't tell them anything because they use it against you.  I was always an open book but near the end, I had learned to be very careful about what I told him.  I couldn't talk about work or anything because during I didn't know what he might say to who.

They use things against us but we never get to know the really insane things about them.  Really makes you know how calculating they really are.

OMG Finallyhappy! That sent shivers up my spine - what an a$$. I got much of the same except I had terminated because we had only been together for 2 months. In the break up chat he congratulated me for chosing him over the child... .

Sir, I was asked very personal questions at the beginning of the r/s with BPD - and they came back to haunt me.

Went to bed a hero, woke up a zero.  She raged for an hour about how evil I was.  I asked what I could have possibly done while asleep.  Her only answer “You know what you did”.  After weeks of silent treatment she admitted she had DREAMED I had done something.  She then said she was in touch with reality because she knew it was a dream FROM DAY ONE.  

She never told me what the dream was about or apologized.

It's uncanny how they can all hit us right where it hurts. My uBPh when raging will say and do almost anything including:

- telling D14 that she doesn't derserve to live in "his" home and she should get out (she did absolutely nothing to deserve this btw)

- told me he wishes I would just die

- told me that I probably am trying to get rid of him because my x has a bigger you-know-what

- constantly tells me I'm broken (this used to hurt the most but, it doesn't)

- pinched me really hard while pregnant while I was trying to go to sleep, can't seem to get over this even though it was 4 years ago.

I could go on and on but, I would have to re-read my journal as I try and block the really bad stuff out.

And thats why you feel so betrayed. In a passive aggresive way this can also be done. After forgetting my birthday she promised to buy me a present. She told me which present she was going to buy. I told her before I wanted that for a long time, so I was really looking forward to it. A long time nothing, then a $1 bag with candies was given as a present. I think emotional abuse is a strong word, but this could be emotional abuse.

Oh god, there are so many... .how could I possibly choose?

The most f***ed up thing she ever said/did? In a nutshell, I think that would simply be existing. lol

i wanted to toss this gem in here.

5 days into NC back in january... .Seperate from this permanent NC (2 months in)

She sent porno of myself to my mother. From a 3rd party telephone number.

My mom was going into a lung cancer screening that day and her lifelong friend had recently died

My ex knew my mom was having health issues as well

Most ominous thing ever said "I don't expect us to last because none of my relationships do, and if things are going too well between us I'll just find a way to sabotage it."

I asked "how would you sabotage it?"

She said "I just will."

Lots of horrible things have been said to me,  but by far the worst was when we went on holiday abroad and My BpD partner beaten up abandoned in a foreign country.

A few weeks after my sick disabled father got out of intensive care (30% chance of survival )

"Crying I know it selfish but I hope he does not get I'll and ruin our holiday "

Few months before the BU

" Annoyed voice : yes I know I'm probably going to have to put up with u quitting your job if your dad dies "

"I'd love to have a one night stand at a music festival  "

" if I was single I probably would have slept with one of those strippers "

" after making a pathetic attempt in front of me to cut her wrists and take an OD "

Just let me go just let me go (like I was her jailer )


Three weeks before the BU

I would kill myself if anything happened to you !

After the BU laughing I was just being dramatic

That is soo true... .what if the situation had been reversed And she had witnessed 9/11... .?   Bet it would be a little different!  

With mine,  the one thing that really sticks in my mind is what she said about 6 months in... .unsolicited and unprovoked she said: "I promise you I will never hurt you, infared."... it was said with such touching sincerity... it really, really sucked me in.   No one had ever said/done anything like that with me in a relationship before. It soo endeared her to me.  Now I look at THAT as the sickest thing that anyone every said to me... .(fast forward 4.5 years), as I never have had some treat me so cruelly and vindictively in my entire life. Cheating on me, lying about it, running out of our home with a bag of clothes and then every chance she and new supply got they were acting out in front of me in public to cause me emotional harm like 7th-graders. Who does crap like that in their mid-30's?  

I'm still dumbfounded.

"I am not in denial."

The uBPDgf is the only child and daughter of my father's best friend. On her father's request, she called me to ask a doubt about computer and we ended up talking for whole night till 7 AM next morning. Proposed me within 2 days and after 10 days, we had our first date in her home. She also forced me to making out on the first day we met. Her birthday was just a week ahead from our first date. The day before her birthday, I stayed in her home until 1AM. She was cuddling me and talking romantic stuffs for the whole night. She never called/texted on the next day which was her birthday. I called her at 9:30PM(her number was busy for like an hour but I kept trying) and asked why she hadn't called me as I missed her so badly since it's her birthday. She said she will talk later and I received a text message after 10 mins and it read

I'm seeing you only as my brother.

My heart and brain teared apart after reading that message.

I don't love you, I never loved you, the last two and a half years were a lie.

Please believe me that I'm leaving because I love you, this is me loving you as best as I can.

What my exBPD wife SAID... .

"People are mean.  All they ever want to do is hurt you!"

What my exBPD wife DID for 2 years previous to this earth shattering statement... .

Abused, used, manipulated, slept with, lied or stole from anyone she got her hooks into.

 Happy Easter or whatever holiday you may be observing today.  I hope you all find a deserving treasure of love, support and happiness from this day forward.  

Ex-BPD (upon being confronted by me for cheating and during breakup): (1) "I wanted you to fight for me!" and in the same conversation (2) "But I don't want to lose you!"

Ex-NPD: "What difference does it make how happy you are as long as we're together?"

"I love you forever"

Most of the really messed up stuff was subtle and psychologically damaging rather than shouting and name calling. One example towards the end of the relationship was her repeatedly singing a tune which had been used at a friend of mine's funeral just as the coffin was being cremated a few days before. Weird, creepy and cruel. Within a week of telling me she was pregnant she texted me to say that the relationship was unsustainable and she was looking at joining single parent forums online? The top thing was probably her complaining to me what a disappointment my proposal to her was, although it wasn't at the time, also her wailing and rocking on the floor of the bathroom on the night of our wedding (feels strange typing that, nobody was allowed to call it a wedding) saying how scared she was that I would turn into a monster, that it was all a mistake and how everyone had had such a terrible time because the speeches had overrun (everyone had a fantastic time even her!).

"We are one now, our consciences are now one and the same."?

Other messed up stuff was all about painting herself as a victim or creating chaos.

My ex once during a phone argument screamed (literally) down the phone at me that she was going to cut her wrists and make me listen to her bleeding to death and that there would be nothing I could do about it because I didn't know where she was. It took me about 1/2 an  hour to calm her down on the phone.

I think that was quite f'ed up. :/

*mod*

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