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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting => Topic started by: formflier on June 29, 2014, 01:13:49 PM



Title: Big week for me and a small success
Post by: formflier on June 29, 2014, 01:13:49 PM


So... this week I am meeting with family T.  I am hoping to get an indication of how the first round of "evaluations" went on my uBPBw. 

I will admit to being nervous... . after 5 years of a pattern... . the pattern has been broken.  I'm hopeful but I also don't know what to expect (since there is no pattern to follow).

Also... today in church my uBPDw brought up 4th of July plans.  Earth shattering because normally these plans are "imposed" on me at the last minute.  We discussed and seem to be on same page about something we can all do that is good for all of us.

I'll take anything that I can call progress!   :)



Title: Re: Big week for me and a small success
Post by: formflier on July 01, 2014, 08:44:53 PM


Good family T session for me today.

uBPDw showed for her evaluation and has further evaluations scheduled soon.

More later on this.


Title: Re: Big week for me and a small success
Post by: Allmessedup on July 01, 2014, 09:11:16 PM
Yay formflier!

One very positive step for your relationship!


Title: Re: Big week for me and a small success
Post by: KateCat on July 01, 2014, 11:15:25 PM
Very good news. |iiii Good for your wife for being willing and able to do this.


Title: Re: Big week for me and a small success
Post by: formflier on July 02, 2014, 11:07:13 AM
Very good news. |iiii Good for your wife for being willing and able to do this.

Yes... .very good.

I suppose the next big checkpoint is when the evaluations are done... .and there is a dx... .or "ah haaa" moment... .

I'm expecting something like that in a week or two. 

The good news is that the patterns of the past are broken and no longer being followed.  Praying that we both continue to make healthy choices.



Title: Re: Big week for me and a small success
Post by: KateCat on July 02, 2014, 11:22:09 AM
Your realism and your determination are more good things.  |iiii

I guess you can't control or manage how the therapist might handle any potential diagnoses, but I wonder if you have a sense yet of how diplomatic he might be if he has to communicate difficult findings.



Title: Re: Big week for me and a small success
Post by: stuckgirl on July 02, 2014, 11:41:24 AM
wow,congratulations are in order!

its good she's making such progress.i hope that both of you continue the hard work you're both putting in and your relationship continues to get better  |iiii


Title: Re: Big week for me and a small success
Post by: joshbjoshb on July 02, 2014, 01:33:04 PM
Very J of you! Yet very happy for you!


Title: Re: Big week for me and a small success
Post by: Mono No Aware on July 02, 2014, 02:11:17 PM
So... this week I am meeting with family T.  I am hoping to get an indication of how the first round of "evaluations" went on my uBPBw. 

Congrats! Got my fingers crosses for ya that the T knows about and deals with BPD.



Also... today in church my uBPDw brought up 4th of July plans.  Earth shattering because normally these plans are "imposed" on me at the last minute.  We discussed and seem to be on same page about something we can all do that is good for all of us.

It's a trap.

But you can make it work! Stay committed to the course DO NOT WAVER OR WAFFLE - be consistent with what will always be referred to as "our" plans for the 4th.


Title: Re: Big week for me and a small success
Post by: formflier on July 02, 2014, 03:14:55 PM
Your realism and your determination are more good things.  |iiii

I guess you can't control or manage how the therapist might handle any potential diagnoses, but I wonder if you have a sense yet of how diplomatic he might be if he has to communicate difficult findings.

I think he will be very diplomatic... .and he realizes that figuring out the issue or issues with uBPDw is critical to getting a functioning family unit back again.

He's also been direct with me about saying that he is confident he can figure it out (the dx)... .but also has been putting the notion in my head that I need to be prepared to be "the healthy one" and that there may not be a miraculous recovery by my wife... .or that it may take a while.

He knows about BPD... .and is prepping me that is may turn out to be more PPD (paranoid personality disorder) that BPD. 

So... .the good news is that I feel I'm in good hands and that the pattern has been broken.