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After a bit over a week of NC with my (trying to be ex) friend, she sends me a message.  I swear she is some kind of psychic freak lol  It's not the first time the timing of her contact has been weird.  Last Friday I had decided to have a break from Facebook for a couple of months - having nearly 100 mutual friends as her - started to become a bit of a problem (I deleted her a few weeks ago).  Today I created a new Facebook account only to use messenger to keep in contact with friends overseas. 

Tonight I went on to my old account to see if another friend had contacted me back... .low and behold there is a message that says, "how are you lovely?".  Just when I felt like I had taken back power over my life, she messages me being NORMAL. 

I know this probably seems insignificant compared to what all of you have been through (my heart goes out to all of you after reading some of the stories  ), but it's really frustrating me.  I felt like I finally reached a good point today... .acceptance.  I finally started accepting that she has a disorder - that her 'all over the place' behavior is who she is - that the original her was part of the disorder too.  I had worked through the trauma and pain I felt last week.  Cried out the hurt and loss.  I also accepted that I may not hear from her again (probably kidding myself there).  I wasn't as anxious at work today either.

So she doesn't contact me for a whole week at work - keeping me on edge after she said she would touch base - now comes back all normal.  This is shorter time between contact than the previous.  I hadn't heard from her for nearly 3 weeks last time.  I am literally shaking my head. 

Thanks for letting me vent :)

Stay strong... .maintain that NC!

Thanks Deeno02  :)

Sorry to read about your bad dream.  Here's hoping sweet dreams are to come :)

Hadlee, I can relate to your pain. My ex BPD came back one time after 18 months and acted like NOTHING had happened. He pretended too everything was normal. I think this is part of the sickness. They avoid the true pain through honest communication because it is easier for them... .Stay strong and N/C.

I am not sure how I am staying strong and NC...

Last Night another Messeage via text from her after she abandoned me 4 weeks ago while I was at work.

''I just woke up.I had a dream I was sleeping with you AND OUR PUPPIE HOLLY.You were holding me and cuddling me tight.But you not here Mike.I am sorry if I woke u up.I am sorry for everything that happened.I am sorry you think I am a bad person...

I have not answered this text.Then she called my phone about 20 minutes ago and I did not answer...

I need space to figure out what she is all about.I lost so much trust in her and most days I don't feel safe with her.I am not sure I want to get back in that ring with her even though I do love and care for her.

Stay strong is all I can say.

Oh it's just awful.  It's times like these where I question my pain and negative thoughts about her.  I've been sucked in so many times before - only to be hurt even more.  Ugh it's sad!

NYMike - that is so tough!  I'm sorry to hear that.  Damn, a friendship is bad enough - I don't know how you and all the others get through a romantic relationship with these sad souls.  I have nothing but respect and admiration for your courage.  I really hope she eases up soon for you