Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: parisian on December 24, 2014, 04:06:07 AM

Title: Things I will do in 2015
Post by: parisian on December 24, 2014, 04:06:07 AM
There are many of us posting on these boards at various stages of recovery. Still struggling in many ways, still going between the different stages of grief and back again. Still wondering why they did what they did, why we did what we did.

I am just over three months break up from my 1.5 year r/s with exBPDgf. I have been trying to maintain low contact, and act out of compassion towards her. Whilst the relationship was verbally abusive and difficult (I have PTSD as a result :/), it ended in a relatively positive, kind and drama free way (that was mostly as a result of me 'apologizing for not being what she needed'. The low contact has been difficult because she speaks to me with her angry parent voice. I know we can never have a real friendship, and I have no desire to ever be back in that relationship.

Despite all that, coming into 2015, my focus is going to be on me moving forward including:

1. Start exercising regularly and be fit and healthy

3. Continue to meditate every day

4. Read more often

5. Create social events and fun things to do with normal healthy people, and increase my social circle

6. Continue therapy and work on my FOO issues and co-dependency

7. Be curious, grateful and do things that make me happy :)

2015, you are my year of happy :)

What are others going to commit to, to make 2015 their year?

Title: Re: Things I will do in 2015
Post by: CloseToFreedom on December 24, 2014, 04:35:19 AM
Good, positive thread! I'm close to a month out of my 4,5 relationship with my exUBPDgf. Still very hard, but I'm trying to cope.

My resolutions regarding this subject:

1. Never, ever get back to her, even if she initiates the contact

2. Never show her my desperate side again, try to maintain NC if possible

3. Work out more, just like I loved to do when I was in the relationship

4. Try to enjoy my hobbies again, like gaming and going out

5. Try to pick up new hobbies, that give me a feeling of satisfaction. Maybe volunteer work with elderly or an extreme sport or something

6. Make sure my work isn't influenced by my private live, keep building my career

7. Don't get in contact with new women just to not be alone. Be with them only if you really want to, because they are nice persons.