BPDFamily.com

Many of you have seen my posts in the past.  I've new struggles now, folks.  My husband had a major stroke Oct 25th and has been home with me since beginning of Nov since he refused inpatient therapy.  All was going well and he was gaining ground, but recently (in the last month) he's gone back to his lazy self.  He's not been doing his exercises and my encouraging him hasn't helped.  Now I'm feeling like a caged animal and I have no room to breathe.  I do absolutely everything here~~including hauling firewood to the house and keeping the house warm because we don't have any other source of heat.  I'm burning out.  I've spent the last 2 weeks in my pajamas.  I don't care if I look like hell or not.  I tried talking to him about me going to some yoga classes because me feeling good may be beneficial to us both.  His comeback was clear... .not happening.  "How would YOU going to yoga help me get better"?  UGH!  I'm venting here.  I know there are a million answers to the above issues.  I know that I should take care of myself, but I'm his primary care taker and I can't work because I can't afford to have someone come in and care for him.  It would cost me more than I'd make.  Friends have helped as much as they can.  My sister has been amazing.  His family does NOTHING!  I'm at a loss.  I need space to breathe!

Take it. Why does he have to agree? Your yoga should be your choice. You can explain your need for it in the best way possible. But having done so--do it.

I'd go a step further than P&C

Don't even ask him about taking care of yourself. Do it. Heck, you don't even have to tell him anything other than that you are leaving the house for a couple hours.

Before he had the stroke, he had very little capacity to see your needs and wants, support them, encourage them. The stroke obviously didn't help.

 You sound like you feel trapped by being his caretaker/caregiver.