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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: dagwoodbowser on May 12, 2015, 01:20:02 PM



Title: Ode to the Void
Post by: dagwoodbowser on May 12, 2015, 01:20:02 PM
You walked into my life and infused me with your magical piercing words and phrases. As your eyes gazed into mine every moment, feeling and emotion anticipated and reflected back onto me hypnotizing me to a slumber into a helpless state of unconscious. To your bidding and bekon call. All the while as you merge with me you absorb and freely take the good as you transfuse and tarnish me with your viral toxic vibe. The intense eurphoric buzz of your substance absorbed through my skin or psyche has me numbed with a joyous exctasy. I want to stay here. Yes, I'll be your slave for your exotic, erotic lust. An obsession at arms reach yet never to possess.

I want to say it but I cant. I see what you're doing, what you're saying but this comatose state you've induced me to wont let the words out. The wrong word, wrong phrase and you summon out the person, that entity that frightens me and turns me to a frightened intimidated child. I dont think I want to stay here anymore. Such strange Love. Joy, pain, lust, rage and as i'm bent right before I break you feed me joy again. Ok, I think I'll stay here for now.

A day like any other day. A few clouds, the sun breaks lightly. I reach for your doppelgänger, your clone, this electronic device in my hand that is my life link to you, your body's double. I am eager to see what you want to tell me today! "I am Done!" "You're weak and pathetic, I need a real man!" 

So once again it's lights out. The hand that reaches into my throut and guts me. I guess I had nothing left to give as all I had that was freely given is gone? When she called out I was there... .always. Now I call out into a void, an emptiness that is so hollow and dark I can not see or feel. Blind, deaf and dumb... .numb.