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Title: validation Post by: Eco on September 20, 2015, 09:09:11 PM I had my daughter this weekend she is 2 and 1/2. She is struggling right now with wanting to be " home" as she calls my house, for the record she calls ex house mammas house not home. She never gives me trouble and I have yet to put her in time out, a stern voice is all that's been needed. Today when it was getting time to go back to ex I let her know like normal and she seemed ok but a few minutes later she was putting play dough in her mouth and I physically had to take it from her after she refused to stop, then she was dumping toys on the floor in a agitated way. This is not like her at all so I asked her what was wrong and if she was upset about something, she didn't want to leave home. I told her that It was ok to feel that way and that I wished she could stay but that it was time to go back to momma for now and I talked about when she could come back.
could I have validated her more? or said something different? She was better after that and said " I'm sorry daddy" On the way to exs house my daughter was watching videos of me and her on my phone and was very happy, she loves to watch all the videos I have of us. I have taken videos of her with me or with my family every time ive seen her since she was born so needless to say I have hundreds. She was clutching my neck when I got to exs house and I had to almost pry her off of me. Is it bad to pry her off of me like that? I don't want her to think I'm just dumping her off. Her mom is in the middle of painting my daughter black because my daughter isn't rejecting me like she wants. ex did this to a degree with the other 2 kids as well once they hit roughly the same age Title: Re: validation Post by: Turkish on September 20, 2015, 11:36:45 PM Eco,
I know you're nervous about the PA, but it sounds like your little girl lves her Daddy much much. I think what you said to her was very validating, and age-appropriate. The changing households is stressful for all, but it is what it is. You can help her by continuing to do what you are doing, with love. T Title: Re: validation Post by: Eco on September 21, 2015, 07:47:42 PM Excerpt I know you're nervous about the PA, but it sounds like your little girl lves her Daddy much much. Empathy Thanks Turkish, I'm not to worried about the PA at the moment because it seems to be back firing on ex. I'm more concerned about validating her emotions and helping her deal with being painted black by her mom Title: Re: validation Post by: livednlearned on September 22, 2015, 05:58:26 PM It sounds like you validated her, eco. Is there something that made you worry otherwise?
Title: Re: validation Post by: Eco on September 22, 2015, 09:38:38 PM Excerpt It sounds like you validated her, eco. Is there something that made you worry otherwise? I'm not that great yet with validation yet so I always feel like I should say more. |