BPDFamily.com

Hi all,

Has anyone tried anti-depressants or anti-anxiety meds in the aftermath of your breakup? Were they helpful?

Thanks

Yeah, but not just after the breakup.  I'm not a physician, but I've got quite a bit of personal experience.  It's definitely something best discussed with your doctor, however.

There's a huge range of antidepressants and anti-anxiety meds.  Unfortunately, there is no good way to tell what drugs might be effective or to which a patient might respond poorly.  Psychiatrists can make an educated guess, but in the end it really comes down to trial and error.  Sometimes it can take quite a while to find a good drug, and there are also some situations where the patient is treatment resistant.  There's little way to know until a range of drugs have been tried.

I should also mention that sometimes medication isn't the best fit.  Talk therapy and things like mindfulness meditation have also been shown to be effective and sometimes are a better choice.  Often a combination of the these produces the best results, but everyone is different.  Basically, in the end it all comes down to trial and error and finding what works best for you.

Edit:  Some psychiatrists love to pile on drugs.  They give drugs to treat the side effects of other drugs and before you know it you are on half a dozen medications.  I would tend to advise anyone with a psychiatrist like that to seek a second opinion to see if such a large degree of medication is really necessary.  Overmedication is real.

One of the best gifts I received in this messy r/s was that by way of "couple's counseling", is that I ended up finally being treated for my ADD (I am a 48 yr old chemist!).

Other than that, there is no magic pill to make our grieving and loss disappear. I found that it is best to face it, head on, go into counseling for guidance, and be loving to yourSelf. After the dust settles, if your T and you think you need to go on meds, then that is something to address then.

I agree with cosmo that it's trial and error, and all pharmaceuticals have side effects, the thought being the benefit outweighs the side effects.  I'm not a fan, but realize the right drug is beneficial for some people.

I've been using 5-HTP and SAMe with good results; they're both naturally occurring in the body so they're supplements not drugs, and one thing I like is you take them for a short time, maybe 6 weeks, and they "jumpstart" serotonin production and then you can stop.  Works for me, I got a strong dose of "happy" immediately and have more or less retained it after stopping the supplements.

And then daily exercise, a clean diet, enough sleep, good hydration, meditation and simplifying our lives, in conjunction with the biochemical part, can be a profound solution to most doldrums, especially if we aren't focusing on those and haven't for a while.  And something that helps with that focus is an overall focus on self compassion, a vital and often missing piece.  Take care of you!

Thanks, this is so helpful. I'll talk to my T tomorrow about options. The SAMe &  5-HTP sound like a good combo to try!