Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: woofbarkmeowbeep on February 02, 2016, 09:52:12 PM

Title: My mind/brain feels scrambled post break up... what about you?
Post by: woofbarkmeowbeep on February 02, 2016, 09:52:12 PM
After an intense build up and seemingly great connection, I moved across the country to stay with her for 6 weeks. 1 week into it she had sex with her ex and the next week she told me to leave (despite promising she would never do such a thing prior to me coming).

I'm now stuck in her country for the next few weeks before I go home and I feel as though my mind is scrambled... like I've been knocked out by Mike Tyson or something... I've had headaches the past two weeks (since we ended) and I'm just really confused at the whole thing...

I assume it's probably similar to many people's situation post being discarded... ?  I mean... I get why she has done what she has done at the BPD level, but at the human level it's still so shocking how someone could profess all kinds of love one day and throw you away the next.

Title: Re: My mind/brain feels scrambled post break up... what about you?
Post by: VeraTrue on February 02, 2016, 10:09:33 PM
You've been going through a trauma, and your body and mind are feeling/showing the effects. One of the crucial things to prevent PTSD is for someone to simply witness you in processing what you have experienced, while your body processes the trauma. Of course, you're in some country that isn't your own, I imagine without any support structure around you, with a possible language barrier too. You must feel very alone. But it would be a good thing to find someone to witness your experience as early as you can in this process. Is there anyone near you that you can talk to? Perhaps seek out a counselor there who can just listen to you tell your story? Maybe there's some kind of support group or something you could find. You're doing the right thing to reach out for support here. There's a lot of folks who know how you feel. I sure do. You reached for what felt like love, what was presented as love, and that's not a bad thing. You made a hopeful and trusting choice. You didn't deserve to be mistreated for it. I'm sorry that she hurt you this way.