Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: hope2727 on April 19, 2016, 06:06:58 PM

Title: You have Facebook memories to review for today
Post by: hope2727 on April 19, 2016, 06:06:58 PM
So if you are on Facebook and receive these notices about your memories on FB I encourage you to pick a year and go review your timeline.

At first I found the memories very distressing as I really do love and miss my expwBPD. Now as I scroll through our years together I am amazed at how many pictures i look really happy in but was actually miserable.

I have the photos of me alone, at events he wouldn't come to. I have the pictures of me alone, when I was out pouring my heart out to a friend(s). I have the pictures of the two of us looking happy but when I was miserable and only posted the "happy looking" ones. Or better yet the ones of trips where he was a complete jerk pants to me and then booked a weekend away to smooth things over. Yet he invariably baited me or triangulated me even on those trips. Or the ones where he broke up with me by text and then I posted Fake happy pictures to prove he didn't devastate me (which he totally did) and left them for him to see. Ok I still post happy photos when I am not happy but you get the point. Yuck. All around yuck.

We deserve respect, reciprocity, consistent empathy, compromise and cooperation. We deserve to be safe in our relationships. The end.

So yes I love him. Yes I miss him. Yes I love him unconditionally. That doesn't mean I have to put up with his nonsense and bad behaviour unconditionally.

So look back when you are ready. Peer into your own eyes. What was happening in those photos? Where were you? Were you actually happy or just trying to convince yourself? Its worth examining once you have enough distance.


So I may miss the good but man there was a lot of really, really bad.

Title: Re: You have Facebook memories to review for today
Post by: WoundedBibi on April 19, 2016, 06:36:06 PM
And I once again know why I hate social media and don't partake in it. Never have, never will.

No worries about blocking or unblocking, comments from flying monkeys or replacements, no crying over timelines or changing profile pictures, declining number of 'friends' because they choose sides after someone has been painted black, none of it.

I can recommend it  |iiii