BPDFamily.com

hi all,

I'm wondering if anyone has any experience with taking a break vs. a break up. I love being with my exBPD (broke up a week ago) but the devaluation/discard stages are super tough. We have had three recycles so far, and I'm wondering if it makes more sense to think of the time apart in my head as "taking a break." Do you all have any experience with this?

I'm guessing it depends on the BPD individual. Some always come back whether frequent or not to never.

Right now I'm given the silent treatment. It's been a week now so I assume it's a discard.

What to make of it? a break up? a break time?

Could be either one and depending on what was said and how it ended.

Before getting back together I told my BPDgf (soon to be ex?) that I am still grieving what happened to us and she told me that I could spend as little or as much time as I like with her. I could have chose to have a break then and she would have waited I think.

Would you prefer yours to be a break up or a break time?

You could think of it as "taking a break" I guess if that makes you feel better or if you're confident she'll return soon. I wouldn't wait around forever.