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Title: Most of me moved on but. (Please help) Post by: Dontknow88 on July 28, 2016, 10:30:08 PM But now I feel like I'm stuck with pointless drama for the next 18 years (we have a child together) how do you deal with them if things are often bumpy with what's left of the relationship as parents. I'm far from comfortable to letting him take our son for weekends (he's under 1 year old) he hasn't been stable for about 10 months now.
Also have you ever felt sorry for the new person th their life? Do they find stable relationships while unstable ? Thinking about my sons future gets me a bit down seeing what he may have to deal with (also his dad doesn't want to get help, thinks ONLY meds will help and dosent even take the recommended dose) Title: Re: Most of me moved on but. (Please help) Post by: Turkish on July 28, 2016, 11:11:25 PM Hi Dontknow88,
Welcome to the board It does feel like a long haul at this point, not only for you, but for your son. It's there a legal custody order in place at this point? How did you you both agree to the current arrangement? To answer your detaching question, I kind of felt sorry (empathy) for my kids' step dad when I started to observe her belittling him publicly. There are a lot of resources here which can help you raise your son with an unhealthy parent. What is your immediate concern? Title: Re: Most of me moved on but. (Please help) Post by: bus boy on July 29, 2016, 05:00:05 AM Hi, sorry to hear of your situation. Turkish has good advice in his post. Your concerns are very real.
Title: Re: Most of me moved on but. (Please help) Post by: Dontknow88 on July 29, 2016, 10:19:07 AM Hi Dontknow88, Welcome to the board It does feel like a long haul at this point, not only for you, but for your son. It's there a legal custody order in place at this point? How did you you both agree to the current arrangement? To answer your detaching question, I kind of felt sorry (empathy) for my kids' step dad when I started to observe her belittling him publicly. There are a lot of resources here which can help you raise your son with an unhealthy parent. What is your immediate concern? Hello, nothing legal right now, he lives in another country right now and he is understanding that I am the full time parent,he's financially there and try's to visit once a month (but for how long?) My immediate concern is that he's going to pop up One day and want to take my son by himself with new girlfriend for the weekend. (Word is she's "open-minded" "crazy" too) My concern is that throughout life hes (my son) just going to see new "Aunts" make attachments with them and lose contact because dad can't keep up a relationship. Or even keep up a relationship with my son. I can't tell you how many times he told me he doesn't know how long he's going to love my son. It's a bit confusing that though he was planned out of "love" and All he broke up with me late in my pregnancy and said he regrets the baby because I won't give him any more time. He sound like a jealous little kid. So for that my other concern is some hidden resentment he has for my son. Told me about a relationship would've lasted longer if it wasn't for him. And now he's all in love with my son, well our son. I think you can see now that I'm just really concerned out of the things he said and actions. On top of that he doesn't know anything about kids know how to take care of them. |