BPDFamily.com

hi,
my BPDex and i broke up 7 years ago... .it was one emotional ride... .at that time i thought i will go crazy... .it was tough but i went total NC... .she tried to contact me... .but i never responded... .not even once... .i do not know where i got the strength from... .but it worked... .got me 3 years to get out of it... .the last 4 years have been great... .feel rejuvenated... .feel physically and mentally great... .having great time with my wife and kids... .running marathons... .going for vacations... .enjoying time with friends... .things are great... .feels like God is on my side... .
during last 7 years i still do think of my ex... .do see her in my dreams... .i guess i loved her, and still do... .but have accepted the fact that she is not good for me... .and i guess i am not good for her as well... .i know that she would have destroyed me completely if i had carried on my relationship with her... .
when i broke up with her... .i deleted all her pics... .so last 7 years i did not see her pic... .recently i saw a pic of her on the web... .all memories of our relationship came rushing back... .as if they were caged some where... .for last week or so i have been rethinking the entire ordeal... .what happened... .what i went through... .where she will be today... .i am still pretty strong, and this 7 year itch will go away in a few days... .i guess this is what they call a moment of weakness... .i am ok, and will be ok... .i hope she is ok too... .
just wanted to share my feeling with the group... .

Hi man34,

Thank you for sharing your feelings. It helps us all to hear what others go through. I'm glad that you feel strong and that your life post-BPD is going so well.  |iiii

That rush of memories and feelings after seeing your ex's picture is interesting. Do you think it has anything to do with how you processed the breakup? Is there anything happening in your life right now that has you feeling a bit off?

I wonder because many of us have had moments of missing our exes when something else  was nagging at us. Of course, it could be just missing someone you loved, which is very normal.

heartandwhole

thanks heart and whole,
not sure if it has anything to do with the way i processed it... .probably does... .just can not pinpoint it... .when the relationship ended and i went nc... .i stuck by my promise to stay nc very strongly... .and avoided all atempts from her side to get back... .thanks

I just went thru a major bout of 'missing' mine, who I haven't seen or spoken to in over 4 years.

Same deal, saw her pic on facebook, with the guy who replaced me, as well as other pics from instagram, etc.

I had moved on so defiantly, yet those pics brought me right back to the days and weeks right after we had broken up... .almost 5 freaking years ago?

It took a few weeks of introspection to realize my romantic life is just in a rut, and some other work issues around the holidays.

All better now, but I still think... .and I realize it's not her I think about, but the rush of our 1st year together... .that idolization was one of the most powerful drugs a man can take 

I guess what I need is to find someone new (not her obviously) to reignite my romantic spark.

hi,
thanks for the reply good to know i am not the only one... .
my life is otherwise fine... .actually better than fine... .i am married with kids... .
nice memories of her still linger... .i have come to accept the fact that i will always love her... .but even after 7 years the crazy making gives me nightmares... .
i just need to stay strong... .will be back to normal in a few days... .