BPDFamily.com

We have all been there: looking at the phone wondering when/if our BPDx will text/call/FaceTime. That in itself stops us from living, we are always on high alert which causes anxiety.

Live in the moment, stop fanning your own fears and stop torturing yourselves. Block your ex on your cel phone: I tried it and it feels great.

Try it for even 5 minutes, and you will see.

Hang in there.

I used to get some anxiety if I was in locations where I expected she might be.
I kind of had to force myself to turn that off. Try to ignore it until it goes away.
Seems to be getting a lot better.

I still get some anxiety tho, if I go somewhere late at night, especially if I go the shopping centre late at night.
It's been 6 months since she tried to run me over, I thought that feeling would have faded by now, especially since I lied and told her the Police were investigating it, but it hasn't really faded much.
Just a few nights ago, I was doing shopping late and I'm still on high alert. Walking back to my car, I'm always on the lookout for people waiting in parked cars or cars driven erratically.

You are absolutely right on. The key is blocking it where we cannot see the messages. They can generate some brilliant communications that can really get a rise out of us. No contact really means no contact. It's time to live your life now.

Yea, I know exactly what you mean about pondering what would happen I ran into her. We live in the same suburb and the likelihood is that within 6 months, it will happen sometime. One of our last conversations after I broke up with her for the last time, was that she no longer shops at the same grocery store just so she can avoid me.

If we did meet each other in a store and acknowledgment was unavoidable, I would probably halfway smile and ask her how she was doing and wish her well, and say I have to run off because I'm running late for something.

It would probably be a bad emotional day for us both.

You might hear me illustrate pwBPD kind of like monsters, but I know they are not. They are destructive forces of nature and leave a trail of disasters behind them - but I believe somewhere deep inside of her is a little girl in there that just wants to be loved. I know she might not ever be happy, but I hope that one day she will wake up and say " enough is enough " and start taking steps where she can start moving closer to having a disorder and away from the disorder having her.

That doesn't change the fact that she would eventually destroy the person she is in a relationship with, whomever that may be.

Every night, when I'm putting my 5 and 8-year-old girls to bed - I tell them how much I love them, how special they are to me, and how happy they make me. I don't ever want them to think otherwise and become internally confused.