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My gf and I are officially back together. Things have been great between us lately and it feels like old times before everything happened. To recap on the situation, I broke up with my gf due to her spending all of her time with her new friends and she ended up sleeping with a girl in her friend group a couple days after the break up. She has been nothing but honest with me, which comforts me, but I am still nervous about this situation arising in the future. She still hangs out with this girl, but only in a group situation as per my request, which she has no problem doing. We will be coming up on our four year anniversary this upcoming April and she has stated that this is her longest, happiest, and healthiest relationship. She claims that I am the one she wants to marry and spend the rest of her life with and this whole situation made her realize what she has to loose. I guess I am just nervous about giving my whole heart again and am having trouble trusting her when she says this is not going to happen again. Has anyone else been in a similar situation? Is it in Borderline nature to repeat these actions over and over?

Hi CookieMonster80,

Do I understand correctly that she slept with someone else after you broke up with her or is there more to this? Was this part of what led up to the breakup?

It is understandable to be nervous to restart with someone. What are you two doing to rebuild trust?

She began hanging out with this new group of friends from her job and refused to invite me along to meet them. After a few weeks of constant fighting due to this, she admitted she had a crush on one of the girls in her group, but claimed I had nothing to worry about. She continued to make plans with them and stated she had no intentions of inviting me because they were "her friends" and I broke up with her due to this. A couple days after the break up, I found out she slept with the girl that she had a crush on. She was honest about everything that happened and also admitted that she had kissed someone during our relationship, but felt instant regret about it and never did anything again.

To be honest, I am not sure how to rebuild trust with her. There is a part of me that does trust her since she is usually very honest about how she is feeling, even if it is something that I do not want to hear. On the other hand, since she did kiss someone during our relationship, I am nervous that something like this will arise in the future if she did not learn her lesson from it the first time. I also do not like the fact that she is still hanging out with this girl, even though it is in a group setting, but since they are her only friends, it kind of makes this situation unavoidable.