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Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD => Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD => Topic started by: Knitpug on January 17, 2019, 12:45:08 PM



Title: BP mother (she is 80, I am 55)
Post by: Knitpug on January 17, 2019, 12:45:08 PM
Have BP mother- she was involved financially with a big family event,of course there were multiple times she said we intentionally humiliated her and basically were insensitive to anything involving her.
That couldn're be further from the truth- I felt very sucked in to accomodate her, as she was the financial support behind the event (she offered, I never asked).
Working hard to get back on track and set boundaries and limits again, after 6 mos. of basically "sucking up".


Title: Re: BP mother (she is 80, I am 55)
Post by: DharmaGate on January 17, 2019, 01:16:25 PM
I am totally with you same situation, I'll be following how it unfolds wishing us all peace! Welcome


Title: Re: BP mother (she is 80, I am 55)
Post by: Harri on January 17, 2019, 05:16:38 PM
Hi and welcome!  I am glad you found us and reached out for support.  That can be hard to do.

What was going on that you felt sucked in?  It can be hard to overcome feelings of guilt and obligation especially if they are mixed with fear and are ingrained and long term patterns of behavior.

I hope you share more as you settle in and read and getr more comfortable.  Posting in other threads can be very helpful as well as it helps build a support network of people who really get it and it helps to know you are not alone in your struggles.


Title: Re: BP mother (she is 80, I am 55)
Post by: HappyChappy on January 20, 2019, 04:59:46 AM
Hey Knitpug - Welcome.

A BPD only does things if they think there’s something in it for them, so if she paid for the event I’m guessing she milked it like a holy cow. On the upside at least she spends, my BPD is tighter than a gnats arse, she expects a hand written thank you letter for tipping a waiter.

What boundaries do you think you should set ?