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Title: Son with bpd Post by: Bdpmom on March 07, 2021, 09:33:35 AM My 27 year old son has recently decided that my husband and I are the reason for all of his troubles. He is seeing a counsellor and is having addiction treatments( pot and binge drinking) He claims that all of his counsellors have told him to eliminate us from his life. ( I can’t imagine that this is true) that being said, it’s been a month since we have spoken with him and I’m not sure what to do.
Title: Re: Son with bpd Post by: old97 on March 10, 2021, 01:57:25 PM Hi bpdmom,
Your story is a familiar one. Blaming others, especially those closest, is a trait of BPD. If your son does have BPD (and it sounds like a real possibility), then the type of therapy he's receiving, and the therapist he's receiving it from, may not be appropriate. Everything I've read has indicated that Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) is the preferred treatment for BPD. Other types of therapy, or a therapist not familiar with BPD, may be counter-productive. One of the toughest things for me in this has been the forced realization that I can't make our pwBPD do anything she doesn't want to. And, until very recently, she hasn't wanted to do anything. What has worked for us (her mother and I) has been to read, learn, and interact here. In addition, her mother is seeing a therapist who is well-versed in BPD. With the therapist's help, her mother has been much more effective in setting and enforcing boundaries and taking care of herself, which has put her in a much better position to care for her BPD daughter. I encourage you to learn more about BPD, and to stay engaged on this forum. You are not alone! |