Title: A turning point? Interesting thoughts Post by: WhatToDo47 on February 04, 2022, 07:17:26 PM My story lives in my other posts, but today I was looking through my pictures because I needed to find an old picture for something. Of course, I scrolled through a lot of pictures of me and my wife.
When she first left, I couldn't even do this. Too painful. Even a few weeks ago, I came across our wedding pictures, almost cried, and had a few days of (fruitless and pointless) contact with her. Today, when I saw the pictures all I could think of was "that poor guy (me)." Instead of seeking to get back to that place, I thought "wow, if he only knew what would happen in 1 month, etc etc etc." I felt like I could comfort myself. I'm not out of the woods, heck I'm still conflicted, but I am healing. Not sure why I posted this, but hopefully it helps someone and I'd be curious everyone's thoughts. Thank you in advance :) Title: Re: A turning point? Interesting thoughts Post by: BigOof on February 04, 2022, 08:27:21 PM Sounds tough. Time to make some new memories.
Join a club recently? Gone out with friends? Got in touch with lost relatives? Title: Re: A turning point? Interesting thoughts Post by: GaGrl on February 04, 2022, 08:38:54 PM There is a grieving by process involved in letting go of a relationship. It's like grieving a death.
Let yourself move through the process. Title: Re: A turning point? Interesting thoughts Post by: WhatToDo47 on February 04, 2022, 09:26:25 PM Sounds tough. Time to make some new memories. Join a club recently? Gone out with friends? Got in touch with lost relatives? You're right! Time for new and better memories. I have been spending a lot of time with family (nice to reconnect with them without BPD drama present). Been working a lot, which is good because I enjoy it and the extra money can be spent on better memories one day. Title: Re: A turning point? Interesting thoughts Post by: WhatToDo47 on February 04, 2022, 09:27:35 PM There is a grieving by process involved in letting go of a relationship. It's like grieving a death. Let yourself move through the process. Thank you, I think I appreciate these boards so much because everyone has been through it. It's not a normal breakup. I had plenty of those, they're sad but makes sense. This is sad and doesn't make sense, but I hope one day I will find acceptance of what happened and not always feel conflicted. Title: Re: A turning point? Interesting thoughts Post by: ForeverDad on February 04, 2022, 09:58:37 PM This is sad and doesn't make sense, but I hope one day I will find acceptance of what happened and not always feel conflicted. For us, Closure is something we Gift ourselves, we wont get it from a pwBPD. Title: Re: A turning point? Interesting thoughts Post by: WhatToDo47 on February 08, 2022, 11:46:25 AM For us, Closure is something we Gift ourselves, we wont get it from a pwBPD. True. For some reason, I don't feel a need for closure. For me, it's more like I would rather have it work or be left alone. Once it's in the past, it's in the past. The limbo state is what's killing me. But I guess if it's up to the pwBPD it will be in limbo forever. Title: Re: A turning point? Interesting thoughts Post by: maxsterling on February 08, 2022, 04:59:35 PM For us, Closure is something we Gift ourselves, we wont get it from a pwBPD. For sure. To get closure from a pwBPD is to assume they have a rational thought process. Title: Re: A turning point? Interesting thoughts Post by: WhatToDo47 on February 08, 2022, 09:52:37 PM For sure. To get closure from a pwBPD is to assume they have a rational thought process. That is an assumption that has bit me countless times over the years Title: Re: A turning point? Interesting thoughts Post by: CoherentMoose on February 10, 2022, 05:50:56 PM There is a new life out there for you. Go get it!
CoMo Title: Re: A turning point? Interesting thoughts Post by: WhatToDo47 on February 13, 2022, 07:02:36 PM There is a new life out there for you. Go get it! CoMo Thank you! All of your support means so much to me truly :) Couldn't do it without all of you. |