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Author Topic: I have not heard anything from my ex fiancee in 4 months  (Read 2231 times)
ShadowIntheNight
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Other
Posts: 442


« Reply #60 on: March 11, 2015, 08:11:52 AM »

Yes... .they are masters of being ruthlessly abusive , but can easily manipulate others to think that they would never act that way. It's a wonderful skill set for them and serves them quite well in their twisted little world.

So true. I wouldn't call it a wonderful skill set, but destructive!
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Infared
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Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
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« Reply #61 on: March 11, 2015, 08:21:59 AM »

Yes... .they are masters of being ruthlessly abusive , but can easily manipulate others to think that they would never act that way. It's a wonderful skill set for them and serves them quite well in their twisted little world.

So true. I wouldn't call it a wonderful skill set, but destructive!

Of course, I was being sarcastic. Can't help it when I think of some of the emotionally cruel things that she AND her new supply did, if I accidentally ran into them when no one was there to see. They had a preplanned script that they would act out. Something that they had discussed in advance? I would tell people and I could tell that they doubted me and thought that I may have gotten it wrong as she had everyone, including me, fooled as to who she ACTUALLY a was.  It was real 7-grade stuff and I just wondered is the new supply mentally ill too or did she just manipulate him in such a way (telling lies or fabricating stories about me?), that he enjoyed being along for the ride of her cruelties?  I can tell you one thing, that that certainly was not the person that I had lived with for 5 years... .it was definitely someone else... .
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happendtome
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« Reply #62 on: January 15, 2018, 12:49:56 PM »

Author of this thread had last comments on this board in 2017. It had been 5 years and still nothing for him. So, either theres some recycling going on now   or BPD-s do really disappear.

Personally, I dont think myself that there could be any big ties left after so many years. Usually. There are some situations where its possible (i have read some threads here where i believe theres something left), but most cases, and i mean most cases, theres nothing left anymore. Maybe you get some "hi, hows it going" when youre 80, but does it matter then?

That topic is good and it has clear sign - we need to move on, no matter how hard it is.

I can assure that it is possible, if we only keep our own promises. There are different methods for healing. You can visit therapist, talk to your friends/family etc. But they cant help you, if you dont want to help yourself.
It is possible to heal even just reading this board and other materials from Internet. Thats what i have done. So, everything is possible - you just have to believe.
Give yourself promises. These can be little ones at first. Step by step.
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Site Director
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« Reply #63 on: January 15, 2018, 01:12:32 PM »

8
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« Reply #64 on: January 15, 2018, 01:17:33 PM »

That topic is good and it has clear sign - we need to move on, no matter how hard it is.

We have had some members recycling for over a decade, after other relationships, in one case that I remember, a marriage.

If a relationship fails badly, its important to process it, learn, and let it go.

Agree.
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Bo123
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« Reply #65 on: January 15, 2018, 10:30:39 PM »

The only sense I've found out of dating then having a break up with a BPD is that it makes no sense.

Hard to take, yes, but these are not the people you hold hands with and sit down on the couch and work everything out with.

It's just not in their DNA.
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