UPDATE: Is it the St. Johns Wort OR does it really get better? Hummmm..

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

Good Morning, Folks:

I just wanted to update you all on my current state to hopefully, encourage some of you that, yes, it does indeed get better.

THE FACTS:

exBPD broke it off with me in November of last year (made for a God awful holiday season).

We briefly recycled in February, just in time to V Day.  Only to crash and burn the week after.

I went NC then.

Started on St. Johns Wort and SAMe  two weeks ago.

Last Monday I reached out to him via email (Friday was his birthday, and I wanted to acknowledge.)  I got NO RESPONSE.



The last several days I have rolled out of bed and oddly enough he was NOT the first thing I thought of.  He has been for MONTHS.

I have a real date with someone I am truly attracted to on Friday and he is someone my good friend knows quite well. (Said I wouldn't date for a year so we shall see... . )



My point is, I don't know if it is the St. Johns Wort, the fact that I have filled my free time with activities with friends and my kids to fill my days, I have gotten in shape OR

just plain on passing of time, but I am heading out and away from this pain.

I DOES get better.  I know he has moved on and has a replacement.  I accept I was his host ad now he has found another therefore I am no longer a priority in his life.

I know he is emotionally sick and will never change.  And I am FINE WITH ALL OF THIS.

This has beena huge learning anf growth curve for me.  Sadly since the start of my journey, I have had two other girlfriends encounter the same thing.  But because of all I have learned here and through just breathing through it, I am helping them out of the darkness too.

For all of you still stuck, believe me when I say I know where you are.  But it DOES really get better.  I am living proof... .

[sirensong65]

Good Morning, Folks:

I just wanted to update you all on my current state to hopefully, encourage some of you that, yes, it does indeed get better.

THE FACTS:

exBPD broke it off with me in November of last year (made for a God awful holiday season).

We briefly recycled in February, just in time to V Day.  Only to crash and burn the week after.

I went NC then.

Started on St. Johns Wort and SAMe  two weeks ago.

Last Monday I reached out to him via email (Friday was his birthday, and I wanted to acknowledge.)  I got NO RESPONSE.



The last several days I have rolled out of bed and oddly enough he was NOT the first thing I thought of.  He has been for MONTHS.

I have a real date with someone I am truly attracted to on Friday and he is someone my good friend knows quite well. (Said I wouldn't date for a year so we shall see... . )



My point is, I don't know if it is the St. Johns Wort, the fact that I have filled my free time with activities with friends and my kids to fill my days, I have gotten in shape OR

just plain on passing of time, but I am heading out and away from this pain.

I DOES get better.  I know he has moved on and has a replacement.  I accept I was his host ad now he has found another therefore I am no longer a priority in his life.

I know he is emotionally sick and will never change.  And I am FINE WITH ALL OF THIS.

This has beena huge learning anf growth curve for me.  Sadly since the start of my journey, I have had two other girlfriends encounter the same thing.  But because of all I have learned here and through just breathing through it, I am helping them out of the darkness too.

For all of you still stuck, believe me when I say I know where you are.  But it DOES really get better.  I am living proof... .

[christoff522]

Good Morning, Folks:

I just wanted to update you all on my current state to hopefully, encourage some of you that, yes, it does indeed get better.

THE FACTS:

exBPD broke it off with me in November of last year (made for a God awful holiday season).

We briefly recycled in February, just in time to V Day.  Only to crash and burn the week after.

I went NC then.

Started on St. Johns Wort and SAMe  two weeks ago.

Last Monday I reached out to him via email (Friday was his birthday, and I wanted to acknowledge.)  I got NO RESPONSE.



The last several days I have rolled out of bed and oddly enough he was NOT the first thing I thought of.  He has been for MONTHS.

I have a real date with someone I am truly attracted to on Friday and he is someone my good friend knows quite well. (Said I wouldn't date for a year so we shall see... . )



My point is, I don't know if it is the St. Johns Wort, the fact that I have filled my free time with activities with friends and my kids to fill my days, I have gotten in shape OR

just plain on passing of time, but I am heading out and away from this pain.

I DOES get better.  I know he has moved on and has a replacement.  I accept I was his host ad now he has found another therefore I am no longer a priority in his life.

I know he is emotionally sick and will never change.  And I am FINE WITH ALL OF THIS.

This has beena huge learning anf growth curve for me.  Sadly since the start of my journey, I have had two other girlfriends encounter the same thing.  But because of all I have learned here and through just breathing through it, I am helping them out of the darkness too.

For all of you still stuck, believe me when I say I know where you are.  But it DOES really get better.  I am living proof... .

I would say its both. Yes it does get better. Once we are over the 'what the heck' of it all, we can just grieve it as a normal thing and get it over and done with and move on.

[1989]

Yay, sirensong65!

[lifeafter18years]

I am glad to hear because it does not feel like that right now but I am barely in my 4th week of losing my POS so called Husband that has never really been a father to his kids but I am starting to see all I am gaining/had from losing such as my Dignity, Sanity, Self Respect, Self Love, Strength, Courage and Hope.  Little by little. So thank you again for your words... . I really like hearing it will get better... . eventually.

[corraline]

Great to hear  sirensong65 !

I believe everything we do in the direction towards our healing is helpful.  I am also taking a few supplements and herbs to help me along.   I thinks its helping too.  Its focusing on ourselves and   practicing good self care.

[cosmonaut]

Hey, Siren, I'm so glad to hear that you are feeling better.  That is wonderful news.  I know you have been through a long, dark night - as have we all.  So happy that dawn is breaking for you.   

Keep going and keep posting.  You can be a true inspiration to others here that are still in tremendous pain.