Facebook Question

[Beware of Junk Psychology...]

I haven't posted here in quite a while. I get on Facebook every week or two mostly to read my news feed. I don't know a lot about the friending etc as I have only started 2 or 3 post and usually just reply or Like what my friends have said. Here's my question... .What causes the picture of my diagnosed BPDexgf to show up front and center of my people who I may know feed? I broke up with her almost 18 m0nths ago.  She was not a member of Facebook the entire 3 years we were together. Within a couple of months of our breakup, she tried to friend a female friend of mine who didn't accept the invitation. When her pic shows up, it says that we don't have any mutual friends. Also , I have never posted a pic of myself and my settings are on private. She would have to ask to see my profile. For the first 5 or 5 months after we broke up, she made attempts to recycle about every 1-2 weeks. She then vanished until 3 or 4 months ago when her pic began showing up.

Is there some Facebook thing that would do this if she ever mentioned my name somewhere , pure coincidence, or has she tried to search for me?

Thanks in advance.

[BenTired]

I haven't posted here in quite a while. I get on Facebook every week or two mostly to read my news feed. I don't know a lot about the friending etc as I have only started 2 or 3 post and usually just reply or Like what my friends have said. Here's my question... .What causes the picture of my diagnosed BPDexgf to show up front and center of my people who I may know feed? I broke up with her almost 18 m0nths ago.  She was not a member of Facebook the entire 3 years we were together. Within a couple of months of our breakup, she tried to friend a female friend of mine who didn't accept the invitation. When her pic shows up, it says that we don't have any mutual friends. Also , I have never posted a pic of myself and my settings are on private. She would have to ask to see my profile. For the first 5 or 5 months after we broke up, she made attempts to recycle about every 1-2 weeks. She then vanished until 3 or 4 months ago when her pic began showing up.

Is there some Facebook thing that would do this if she ever mentioned my name somewhere , pure coincidence, or has she tried to search for me?

Thanks in advance.

[Turkish]

She's probably clicking on your profile... I have a friend who works for FB, and despite being a tech guy, I got lost when he was explaining some of their algorithms. This one seems simple. It bothers you that she is showing up. Block her and her profile will dissappear... .and your profile to hers.

[BenTired]

She's probably clicking on your profile... I have a friend who works for FB, and despite being a tech guy, I got lost when he was explaining some of their algorithms. This one seems simple. It bothers you that she is showing up. Block her and her profile will dissappear... .and your profile to hers.

Thank you for the reply. While I am quite mechanically inclined, I'm not a very good with computer tech. I should be able to figure out how to block her, Will she be notified that I blocked her? I know it sounds silly and maybe childish, but I don't want to giver her the satisfaction that I acknowledged that she got a reaction out of me if that makes any sense.

[Turkish]

I don't think she will be notified. It took my Ex about two weeks to figure it out (when she finally noticed was when she asked if I had seen pics she posted of our kids. I said no. A pause... .then, "did you block me?" Yes.). When she searches for you, that will be the passive notification.

If she is obsessed, she may look at your profile through mutual friends looking by accessing their accounts if they let her. Mine does that sometimes with her family members whom I haven't blocked. It doesn't sound like you are on FB all that much though.

[BenTired]

I don't think she will be notified. It took my Ex about two weeks to figure it out (when she finally noticed was when she asked if I had seen pics she posted of our kids. I said no. A pause... .then, "did you block me?" Yes.). When she searches for you, that will be the passive notification.

If she is obsessed, she may look at your profile through mutual friends looking by accessing their accounts if they let her. Mine does that sometimes with her family members whom I haven't blocked. It doesn't sound like you are on FB all that much though.

Thanks again... .Fortunately she showed up uninvited to a couple of events that she saw that I was attending. This freaked several of my friends out as they heard me ask her several times to "Please leave." About a month later, her job moved her 1200 miles away. I don't know of any of my friends who would do that for her even if she was to come back to my town.

So maybe she is just checking out my private profile page when the urge hits her. 

[Turkish]

It sounds like you're pretty solid on keeping her out of your life. As with any pwBPD, the boundaries lie in our control, though it's definitely fustrating when they try to bust them. Mine won't ever stop doing it, as she tried again this morning. The boundaries lie with us